Safe to meet in Dipolog

[DonJuanMatus]

I've been chatting with a girl I met online who lives near Dipolog.  She wants me to meet her there during her school break in October.

I'm wondering if it's safe to fly in there from Manila?  And how long I could stay there safely?

I've read that kidnappers have lookouts at hotels and airports.

Are there still foreigner's living there after this incident?

She says it's perfectly safe, and it probably is...for her.

I offered to fly her to Manila, but she said her Father won't let her travel alone.  Maybe a ferry ride to Dumaguete would be more reasonable?

What do you guys think?

[Dave Hounddriver]

4 minutes ago, DonJuanMatus said:

What do you guys think?

An off the cuff opinion is:  If you let her dictate what you will or will not do (as in you fly, not her) then be prepared for that to continue and get worse.  If that makes you happy then go for it.  Personally, I would look elsewhere but it is a very subjective opinion.

[DonJuanMatus]

That's a great observation Dave.  Thank you.

[Jollygoodfellow]

split topic 

[Nephi]

17 hours ago, DonJuanMatus said:

I've been chatting with a girl I met online who lives near Dipolog.  She wants me to meet her there during her school break in October.

I'm wondering if it's safe to fly in there from Manila?  And how long I could stay there safely?

I've read that kidnappers have lookouts at hotels and airports.

Are there still foreigner's living there after this incident?

She says it's perfectly safe, and it probably is...for her.

I offered to fly her to Manila, but she said her Father won't let her travel alone.  Maybe a ferry ride to Dumaguete would be more reasonable?

What do you guys think?

Howdy And Welcome To The Forum,

You may have no problems at all. There are expats that do live on Mindanao and in that particular area. However, you need to realize that this is or can be an extremely dangerous 3rd world country. Travel to Mindanao is risky enough that any US government employees are not allowed (even on vacation) to travel there without express consent. When researching safety issues etc, be sure to read the travel warnings on this page of the US Embassy web site. Here is a Current Travel Warning as of the date of my post.

I am going to assume this is your first trip here and as such, for safety reasons, I'd suggest having her meet you elsewhere. Cebu, Baguio City, or Manila etc would be better and not have a safety concern. I've lived here in the islands for many years but I would never consider traveling to that area for any reason.

 

Regards

Nephi

Edited August 21, 2016 by Nephi

[Dave Hounddriver]

2 hours ago, DonJuanMatus said:

I offered to fly her to Manila, but she said her Father won't let her travel alone.

Its common for girls to travel with a chaperone. Maybe a brother of girlfriend.  That may solve your problem, or at the very least tell you whether its a BS excuse or a good reason.  Yes, it will cost you a bit.  If you are really sold on this one girl then it wold be worth your while to meet on common ground rather than meet her with all her family.  "Meeting the family" could easily cost you more than the plane fare for one chaperone.  As always, just my personal opinion.

[davewe]

If the girl is youngish (you said it was school break) and/or living at home I don't think it is unusual for the family to be concerned about her flying to Manila to meet a foreigner. In fact I would be just as suspect if the family said "go ahead - meet him in Manila."

But back to the question about Dipolog. Personally I don't have the general paranoia about all of Mindanao that some have. However, Dipolog is not Davao or CDO. I have a good friend married to a Pinay from Dipolog (my fault - I fixed them up) and certainly the family is very concerned about safety when they come for a visit. It's not an average situation since my friend's FIL is very politically connected and has body guards 24/7 in his compound, who accompany my friend when he goes about; think Michael Corleone when he was exiled in Sicily. I know that the family did not allow them to come to Dipolog around election time. But again this is an unusual situation; not a standard Philippines family.

Bottom line is that if you really like the girl and want to consider her for a potential permanent partner, you will ultimately need to meet the family and get to know Dipolog. OTOH, if your goal is just fun - well you take your chances anywhere in life. But I wouldn't negatively judge her just because she is not willing to meet a stranger in another place.

Edited August 21, 2016 by davewe

[robert k]

What is all this flying her around stuff? She could take the ferry and meet you in Dumaguete. If I were in either Dipolog or Dumaguete I personally would take the ferry. If someone is part of the jet set, then possibly I would pay for a plane ticket, but then if they were part of the jet set I wouldn't need to, would I? If she has never been on a plane before, she might not get on.

I wouldn't want to set the precedent that you fly everyone everywhere, unless of course that is your intention.

[DonJuanMatus]

Thanks everyone, those are great comments.  I would give likes to them all but I can't figure out how to do that yet.

A little about me:

I'm in my mid 40's and I would like to find a permanent partner and probably have a family.  Not sure if I would live there or bring her back to the US.  Could do either I suppose.

The hard part of course is finding the right one.  I'll be flying into Manila next week and will be staying there for a couple weeks or so and then I'm open to going anywhere after that.  So many places, it's kind of hard to choose.  Was hoping I'd find a girl online that would help make that decision for me, but it really hasn't happened.  Some prospects in Manila, and a couple in Dipolog.

Thinking about basing in Dumaguete or Davao because they seem to be less expensive and less polluted than Manila/Cebu.  I've been to the Philippines once a couple years ago and spent a couple months total between Manila and Davao but the ones I became interested in seemed to be taken already.  Every girl I met from online I was not interested in when meeting in person.  I had a great time making friends there (both filipino and ex-pats) and playing music but left empty-handed in the love dept. but felt if I spent more time there (6+ months) and really integrate into the community I might find what I'm looking for.

Hopefully this time around I'll find what I'm looking for.

[Methersgate]

To me, Dipolog is where we get the ferry to Dumaguete. K's family live in Zamboanga del Sur, but come originally from Negros, so we make that trip regularly. I've never thought twice about it. I've never felt at all uncomfortable in Dipolog, but then I have never felt uncomfortable in Molave or in Ramon Magsaysay..

If you are going to stay in Dipolog, I'd recommend D'Hotel and Suites, in the town centre. You'll find a pile of reviews, including mine, on Trip Advisor. It's really a little gem.

K did her English Language Test for her UK Visa at the Ariana Hotel - she was a bit preoccupied (!) but her mother and small boy, who went with her, said it was clean, the service was nice, and they liked the nice big swimming pool.