Living her dream Hating her dream

[stevewool]

3 hours ago, bows00 said:

Oh boy, it's time to have that dreaded talk with your wife - ASAP, before your roots get any deeper.  Does she even have a clue what you are feeling?  Can't believe I asked you that - I feel like Dr. Phil...

I wonder how many are in this situation .

[Gratefuled]

14 hours ago, stevewool said:

Can you afford to leave and move back to where you use to feel safe and secure to what you was use too, or have you burnt all your bridges.

Yes, I can move back and I'm going to with or without her. No bridges to burn. I've been here 6 years now and I have made up my mind. I'm not waiting around any longer. Now, if she will not come with me and at least see what its like then I'll have to say "adios". I'm not hen pecked and I've tolerated this hell hole long enough. 

I'm going back to 3 seasons, snow in the mountains, electricity and running water 24 hours a day every day. Back where I don't have to go to the mall to get half way decent groceries. Back to where there are great restaurants, great amusement parks, great professional sports stadiums, great television and internet service. Back where there are great places to vacation without leaving the country. Back where there are great beaches within an hours drive. Back where I can drive my car again. Back where I can visit my long time  friends and expect them to come around as well. Back where I can see my grand children grow up. Back where there are family reunions Christmas, Easter, New Years, birthday parties, weddings. Back where I can fly the stars and stripes without worrying that I might offend someone. 

I can go on and on but you get the picture. I gave up a lot but enough is enough. 

[scott h]

54 minutes ago, Gratefuled said:

I'm not waiting around any longer

As often as you have expressed this feeling, I am very surprised you lasted this long Gratefuled, as often said, the PI is not for everyone. Good luck

[mogo51]

15 hours ago, Dave Hounddriver said:

Have you lived in the same place all your life, Stevewool?  Most of us have moved a time or twenty.  When you get tired of the new place you move again.  We don't have to put down deep roots, although its starting to sound like you have roots where you are and you don't want to pull them up.

By the way, in the twenty or so times I have moved I never went back to the same place twice.  Been there, done that, there was a reason I felt like moving away and its probably still valid. PLUS there is a whole world to see.  If you get to a place and hate it then try another.  Life is simple.  Just enjoy it.

Burn those bridges.  Its much more fun building new bridges than commuting on the old ones every day.

Again Steve, here is some very sound advice.  I think I have moved more than Dave for various reasons.  But my big move was O/S and overall it has been well worth the effort.  But I am over where I am now in Thailand and moving on.  

If you go ahead and move to where wife's family resides, you will be jumping out of the frying pan into the fire - you can almost be assured of that.  There is evidence already that you will be harassed beyond fair by family with their hands out.  It will only get worse.

Over the years you have put many posts on the forum raising all sorts of reasons why you can't come to the Phils.  Dave may well be right, perhaps you really don't want to leave where you are.  If so, stay there and be happy, that is the most important thing at our stage of life.

[sonjack2847]

16 hours ago, stevewool said:

What happens when the dream turns into a nightmare, you both have planned to make the move back to her homeland and why, the sunshines most of the time, its like being with a family that share many things as well as your cash, plus its cheaper then where you lived before and money is not as flowing as it was before.

Life is good at first but the heat starts to get to you, the family coming around is causing yourself to think you are alone plus you are tide to the place where your wife was born, and its not what you are wanting, but your wife loves it.

Can you afford to leave and move back to where you use to feel safe and secure to what you was use too, or have you burnt all your bridges.

People say dont burn all your bridges because it may not work, so is this a reason not to do it.

People who have moved for the love ones do they know you dont like it , or dont they care, or is it a case you will grow to like it.

I would hate to move to a place and then full out with it , but then not being able to move because of my partner dont want to move or running out of cash.

Why don`t you come over and try the place for a few months.Keep a door open so you can jump back through like Gratefuled is doing.

[Dave Hounddriver]

One of my friends is moving back to the US this June 16th.

He moved here 3 1/2 years ago and burned all his bridges and decided to retire here. He was about 55.  He has had a great life here.  He enjoys it thoroughly.  Friends?  He has a ton of them.  Money?  More than he needs.

But 3 1/2 years ago he met the most beautiful girl you could imagine.  Then came love, then came marriage, then came Bill pushing a baby carriage   So now he and his beautiful wife and child are going to start building a new life back in the US of A so their son can be brought up in that country.

This story is to show you CAN burn all your bridges and under certain circumstances you just go out and rebuild them.  Sometimes you rebuild a better bridge.

[Gratefuled]

1 hour ago, scott h said:

As often as you have expressed this feeling, I am very surprised you lasted this long Gratefuled, as often said, the PI is not for everyone. Good luck

"Love is blind"  yes but it should not be stupid. 

Thanks

[scott h]

1 minute ago, Gratefuled said:

"Love is blind"  yes but it should not be stupid.

lmao, I have to remember that one

[CoffeeRulzMe]

3 hours ago, Gratefuled said:

Yes, I can move back and I'm going to with or without her. No bridges to burn. I've been here 6 years now and I have made up my mind. I'm not waiting around any longer. Now, if she will not come with me and at least see what its like then I'll have to say "adios". I'm not hen pecked and I've tolerated this hell hole long enough. 

I'm going back to 3 seasons, snow in the mountains, electricity and running water 24 hours a day every day. Back where I don't have to go to the mall to get half way decent groceries. Back to where there are great restaurants, great amusement parks, great professional sports stadiums, great television and internet service. Back where there are great places to vacation without leaving the country. Back where there are great beaches within an hours drive. Back where I can drive my car again. Back where I can visit my long time  friends and expect them to come around as well. Back where I can see my grand children grow up. Back where there are family reunions Christmas, Easter, New Years, birthday parties, weddings. Back where I can fly the stars and stripes without worrying that I might offend someone. 

I can go on and on but you get the picture. I gave up a lot but enough is enough. 

Been here 6 years you say?  A lot has changed in the USA; A culture war with it's frequent street protests and anti-conservative white male slant, Hollywood TV is worse now IMHO.  Just to name a few. Instead of giving your wife an ultimatum, just go visit for a month or two; drive a car, attend a few baseball games with your grandkids, etc. It's quite possible you might say to yourself; "Ah, now I remember why I left in the first place." Your spell of homesickness might fade in that month or two. Or your wife might decide to go with you afterall once you start packing.  Expect the unexpected.

 

 

 

[robert k]

5 minutes ago, CoffeeRulzMe said:

Been here 6 years you say?  A lot has changed in the USA; A culture war with it's frequent street protests and anti-conservative white male slant, Hollywood TV is worse now IMHO.  Just to name a few. Instead of giving your wife an ultimatum, just go visit for a month or two; drive a car, attend a few baseball games with your grandkids, etc. It's quite possible you might say to yourself; "Ah, now I remember why I left in the first place." Your spell of homesickness might fade in that month or two. Or your wife might decide to go with you afterall once you start packing.  Expect the unexpected.

 

 

 

I got a bit of a chuckle when he said fly the American flag without offending anyone?