Is it a good idea?

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RonnyRay
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Hi all. I need some serious advice here. I divorced with my Thai wife after almost 18 years of marriage 8 months ago and made the move to Cambodia as I didn't want to be too far away from my 17-year-old son who still lives with my ex in Bangkok. I've been here for about 6 months now (I'm 49, by the way) and I met and started dating a Filipina who is about my age. We've been living together for about 5 months now and along the way decided we'd move to the Philippines in a few months and get married. She is, too me, a very, very good woman and her sisters also seem so nice altho we've only talked and seen each other online. My girlfriend and can and have talked about everything and she is aware that I am by no means wealthy at this point (to say the least).  So I'll cut to the chase now and here's my question: Am I delusional? If I were to go to the Philippines I'd only be worth somewhere around $10,000 but my gf is aware of that and says her sister (Who lives in France) would help her invest in a small business and that living arrangements wouldn't be a problem as her sister (The one from France) has several homes there and would be more than happy to let us live in one and let us "look after it for her", as she put it. So what do you guys think? Am I being delusional or just plain stupid here for even thinking about making such a move? A part of me says "Get back to the USA while you can" while the other part says "You love this woman so don't be so paranoid and just do it!". Can any of you guys give me some advice? Thanks in advance.

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Dave Hounddriver
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10 minutes ago, RonnyRay said:

Am I being delusional or just plain stupid here for even thinking about making such a move?

I know others who have done it, but very few.  So it can be done.  What are you doing for money in Cambodia?  Is your filipina gf planning to set up a business here and take care of you?  Perhaps get you to help out?  I can name a few expats in that situation and it works for them.  It's rare that this works but a 40 ish Filipina living in Philippiines with a 40ish American gets to be a real status symbol.  Just expect that she will want to be the boss in the relationship :hystery:  Such is my 2 cents worth.

It also matters what kind of business she wants to set up, what experience she has in it, the location you both will choose.  There is a lot to consider but . . . .  you are not delusional.   As you said, you can always get back to the USA but what's your rush?  You are here anyway so see if it works and if not then get back to the USA.  (I would not suggest doing it to anyone who is still in the USA but you are almost here anyway so in for a penny, in for a pound.)

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RonnyRay
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Actually, I was planning on teaching here in Cambodia (Not much else to do here and a far cry from selling truck parts which is what I did in Thailand) but haven't yet as I initially took a respite from all work and the subject of moving to the Philippines came up. But yeah, the idea is that my gf starts a small business with help from her sister and I help out which would basically make it a family business which is pretty much how it went when I lived in Thailand. As for a work permit if you're helping out your wife's business in the Philippines? I'm in totally in unchartered waters about that and have no idea what I would need to do to get such a work permit or if I would even need one? Or how strict any law would be about a spouse working with his wife in a shop owned by the wife? So many questions and no answers as of yet (which I hope you guys can help me out with). And btw, I couldn't help but notice your amusement in that might be marrying a Filipina about the same age as me. Why? Is it that uncommon in the Philippines?

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Dave Hounddriver
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49 minutes ago, RonnyRay said:

As for a work permit if you're helping out your wife's business in the Philippines?

Depends on the kind of work but most of the time you are legal working in Philippines on a "legal" married visa (common law doesn't count for squat)

50 minutes ago, RonnyRay said:

And btw, I couldn't help but notice your amusement in that might be marrying a Filipina about the same age as me. Why? Is it that uncommon in the Philippines?

No uncommon, its just that guys with younger wives tend to think they are the boss (they got the gold so they make the rules) but coming with someone your own age will probably be a different dynamic.  But you will find that out for yourself.  Filipinas seem to change when they come back to Philippines after living elsewhere.

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Gary D
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Starting a small business like a shop, sari sari store, in the Philippines will if successful will barely give a subsistance level of income, you will be competing with your neighbours on both sides and across the road. The rate of failure is huge. You will need to husband your funds, you don't have enough to invest anything more than your labour.

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Dave Hounddriver
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59 minutes ago, Gary D said:

The rate of failure is huge.

Did you mean to post this in the "Naysayer thread" :hystery:

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bows00
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Number one, just make sure you have some sort of income stream to live there.  I have seen and heard countless stories of expats that go broke - don't be one of those guys man.  It's a pathetic sight. 

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fillipino_wannabe
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I'd of said no but seeing as she's your age and knows you don't have much money then go for it. Look into online English teaching or VA jobs from the US. My girlfriend works as a VA for a real estate company and makes around $1,000 a month, 9 hour shift but only really requires about 1-2 hours of actual work.

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RonnyRay
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2 hours ago, bows00 said:

Number one, just make sure you have some sort of income stream to live there.  I have seen and heard countless stories of expats that go broke - don't be one of those guys man.  It's a pathetic sight. 

Exactly, and that's what scares me the most as it would be my worst nightmare to be half way across the world broke with no way out. I think the best thing to do is go there with the gf is go on a tourist visa and just sniff around to see what it's like there and what life would be like if I lived there. I'll just have to follow my instincts and if I get any bad vibes then I'm out of there. But I'm in total agreement with you. No steady income= Back to the US ad far as I'm concerned.

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RonnyRay
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3 hours ago, Dave Hounddriver said:

Did you mean to post this in the "Naysayer thread" :hystery:

Yup, he kinda makes you lose hope, doesn't he? Lol...

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