stevewool Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 You know i can go on and on about the family over in the Phils and i can also go on about the lazy members of my family who live here in England too, but i wont, unless i am asked, Anyway back to the Family over in the Phils, Over the time does your feelings change towards them , does it get better or do you just tolerate them for the sake of doing it, maybe they just tolerate you too, who knows, Its Christmas time and you are seeing the family with smiles all dressed nice and everything seems just dandy, everyone is happy, The kids have there presents and there maybe a few pesso given to the older ones for some fags or even a drink , But what about the rest of the year the help you may have given or not given the sorry the answer is NO to this and that, Seeing the pictures of the kids does make me feel guilty inside but why should i feel this way, Its the parents that has caused problems through out the year and deep down i know i can never forgive them for that, i can live with it , so do you just move on and smile or stay a missarable old git in everyone's eyes except yours Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Hounddriver Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 stay a missarable old git in everyone's eyes except yours I'm a miserable old git in my own eyes too. :santa_trumpet: Example, New Years is coming. Y's Mum wants her to spend New Year with them. Ys cousin (like a sister to her) wants her to spend New Year with her family. I don't have any money to give her to go to either place so I told her she had to stay home and do nothing with me. That makes me a miserable old git and its what happens when you try to retire here and live like a king on $1,000 a month. Humbug. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 (edited) stay a missarable old git in everyone's eyes except yours I'm a miserable old git in my own eyes too. :santa_trumpet: Example, New Years is coming. Y's Mum wants her to spend New Year with them. Ys cousin (like a sister to her) wants her to spend New Year with her family. I don't have any money to give her to go to either place so I told her she had to stay home and do nothing with me. That makes me a miserable old git and its what happens when you try to retire here and live like a king on $1,000 a month. Humbug. Double humbug Dave! You can lay out all your remaining pesos on the table and show the logic of it all. Yep, misery loves company and will quickly spread throughout the household. Now I'm a little surprise Dave that you didn't go out to the nearest 5-6 operator, with 30% interest, compounded daily. Forget about trying to keep up with the Jones.......it's keeping up with the Mrs! That's how the world turns over there......he, he. Edited December 26, 2015 by Jake 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post expatuk2014 Posted December 26, 2015 Popular Post Posted December 26, 2015 (edited) My opinion of the Filipino family I am sorry to say has changed over these last 2 years. last year the eldest brother died and his family suddenly decided they had no money to pay for the funeral expenses ! bearing in mind they all have good jobs abroad-mining engineers-nurses. as luck would have it he was a well liked man and his workmates and friends gave thousands of pesos. but at all saints day not one of his sons visited his grave !needless to say my wife and her younger sister were heartbroken. Then this year the wifes mother passed away, and the eldest brother now started a row over the cost of the funeral ! without taking into account the thousands we spent during the year for her hospital bills-medicines etc which because I considered her my mother as well I was happy to pay ! I pulled my wife away from the row before I said something ! so you can imagine the feelings now ! we had no family visit us at xmas either ! so the wife and her sister have decided its just us 3 now and one other brother and his family in Legazpi ! lets hope 2016 will be a better year Edited December 26, 2015 by expatuk2014 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chris49 Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 You know i can go on and on about the family over in the Phils and i can also go on about the lazy members of my family who live here in England too, but i wont, unless i am asked, Anyway back to the Family over in the Phils, Over the time does your feelings change towards them , does it get better or do you just tolerate them for the sake of doing it, maybe they just tolerate you too, who knows, Its Christmas time and you are seeing the family with smiles all dressed nice and everything seems just dandy, everyone is happy, The kids have there presents and there maybe a few pesso given to the older ones for some fags or even a drink , But what about the rest of the year the help you may have given or not given the sorry the answer is NO to this and that, Seeing the pictures of the kids does make me feel guilty inside but why should i feel this way, Its the parents that has caused problems through out the year and deep down i know i can never forgive them for that, i can live with it , so do you just move on and smile or stay a missarable old git in everyone's eyes except yours Slight improvement over time, with a few blips in the middle. Presents are really out of the question here, we give enough on a daily basis even if we cutback a bit. We got lucky today as the family drifted over to Uncle's place next door, food, drinks, and videoke laid on. I was not much in the mood, but I went over for a short break. Gina cooked me something here. I did not drink, I did not buy any. We are gradually getting people to do a little more, one brother, the wayward one has picked up on the cooking, which is a big help. Sis in law helps with child care and all around. Another brother in law does less and he gets less from us also. Steve, when you live here over an extended period, their requests for financial assistance will have dropped once they get used to you. Extreme emergencies only, which we are in a better position to judge than you an EMS. Christmas though is only a prelude to New Years. We have to save for that. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kuya John Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 Steve, please dont bring the bad out in me.... My last trip to Philippines stayed with my wifes closest friend in Manila. Circumstances kept us there 9 day's instead of 3 day's. During our stay the Wifi and Air con was constantly being switched off! (even though we always give money to pay our way) You can imagine my shock to see photo's just today, showing their Home lit up like (Blackpool Illumination's) like a Christmas tree. We always try to help out were needed family or friends, but yes I wonder sometimes if we are taken advantage of, sad but true. Has my feelings changed? I'm afraid mine have, but for my wife's sake we keep on giving...... :santa laugh: 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevewool Posted December 26, 2015 Author Posted December 26, 2015 Has my feelings changed? I'm afraid mine have, but for my wife's sake we keep on giving. Well said John Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 (edited) You know i can go on and on about the family over in the Phils and i can also go on about the lazy members of my family who live here in England too, but i wont, unless i am asked, Anyway back to the Family over in the Phils, Over the time does your feelings change towards them , does it get better or do you just tolerate them for the sake of doing it, maybe they just tolerate you too, who knows, Its Christmas time and you are seeing the family with smiles all dressed nice and everything seems just dandy, everyone is happy, The kids have there presents and there maybe a few pesso given to the older ones for some fags or even a drink , But what about the rest of the year the help you may have given or not given the sorry the answer is NO to this and that, Seeing the pictures of the kids does make me feel guilty inside but why should i feel this way, Its the parents that has caused problems through out the year and deep down i know i can never forgive them for that, i can live with it , so do you just move on and smile or stay a missarable old git in everyone's eyes except yours Over the time does your feelings change towards them , does it get better or do you just tolerate them for the sake of doing it, maybe they just tolerate you too, who knows, Its the parents that has caused problems through out the year and deep down i know i can never forgive them for that, I guess I can consider myself the poster boy of misery. And I'm Filipino, born in Olongapo but thoroughly Americanized. My conflicting background within me fought their daily battles. The two statements made by Steve (outstanding OP!) is just the tip of the iceberg on how exactly how I felt after 7 years, trying to retire there............I escaped back to US with our 4 young children and Judy was left behind, Yeah, talk about misery. But it's all good now. In retrospect however, this OP allows me to finally realize that majority of the problems living in my native land was ME. And thank goodness I found PEF, which opened my eyes to patience, tolerance and more patience. Afterall, most of us are in our senior years -- why sweat with the small chit or why cry over spilled milk. Thanks guys for bringing me back to reality. I need to get back and shake hands of each and everyone of you. I am grateful to be part of this band of brothers in crime......he, he. And of course, also this.......... With a companion by my side.......pass me a cold one babe, while I watch your sunset Edited December 27, 2015 by Jake 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevewool Posted December 26, 2015 Author Posted December 26, 2015 Jake you have a way of saying your words that are so meaning but also we can read with a smile too. By the way the picture is that a picture you took yourself. If so AMAZING 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fred Posted December 27, 2015 Posted December 27, 2015 there maybe a few pesso given to the older ones for some fags or even a drink. The meaning of that particular sentence outside of the U.K can be lost in translation Steve. I've said the same thing myself here socially and have had some right funny looks amongst the Yanks! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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