Maid to order? We have a dilemma!

[OnMyWay]

We have had a new maid / nanny / helper for 2+ weeks now.  She is ideal in most ways: hard worker, knows what to do, loves the kids,  good cook, pleasant to be around.  She is only 19 and was the maid / nanny of one of our wealthy neighbors since she was 14!  We talked with part of that family (it's complicated) and they were ok that she was going to work for us.  I can share more detail at a later time.

Here is the dilemma.  As I said she has been really good in all the usual maid / nanny areas and we enjoy having her here.  Last Wednesday my wife could not find a silver necklace.  It is not extremely valuable, but nice.  She searched hi and lo for 3 days.  On Saturday afternoon, the maid took a day off to go to her sister's house overnight.  When she came back Sunday afternoon, my wife sat her down and directly asked her about the necklace.  She said "no maam, I would never jeopardize my reputation by doing something like that" and swore on a stack of bibles she did not take it.  My wife said she really tried to look for signs of lying, but did not see them.  So, we kept her and things were back to normal.  We have not found the necklace.

So, today, I am looking for a brand new in the package 32 gb memory card for my wife's new phone.  I had it lying around on my desk, last I recall.  I completely cleaned my desk and drawers and everything in the general vicinity, looking for this card.  Still missing.  I got it for free with the phone and I think they are only worth p200-300 lately.

I should mention, we have tried to be careful with valuables since she started.  No more leaving my wallet lying around, etc., and we have a small safe we lock some thing up in.  We have left her at the house alone for short periods, but we lock the door to our bedroom where my wife keeps a few things of value.  There will always be things lying around that you don't consider valuable, but others might.

2.5 weeks and 2 missing small, easy to conceal items.  To be perfectly honest, both my wife and I lose things quite often, so that angle is a worry for us.  And with 2 small kids who like to play with things too.  One of my expensive Trailblazer keys was missing for a few months before we found it in with some of the kids toys.

What to do?  Continue to give her the benefit of the doubt?  Confront her again and/or let her go?  She has really been a great help to us in every other way.  With 2 small kids and a teenage daughter and an old daddy, her help has been a blessing to us in many ways.

Signed,

Dilemma Don

 

[OnMyWay]

Update.  Trash goes out early in the morning so I decided to check my desk trash can, again.  I had checked it earlier today but did not go quite all the way to the bottom.  I dumped the bag out and what the heck, the 32 gb card was at the bottom!  And actually, the card with plastic on it was separate from the cardboard because I had ripped part of the cardboard off when I wrapped it with the phone for Christmas.

So on we go......  I have no idea how it got in the trash can.

[Gary D]

sounds like a bit of entrapment is required.

[Jollygoodfellow]

1 hour ago, OnMyWay said:

So on we go......  I have no idea how it got in the trash can.

I think that the issue is most likely your own end. If the maid worked for someone since 14 then and if she was a thief it would have been over long before. You have kids as you say and have lost things before only to find later like just now the 32gb card.

Give the girl a break 

[fillipino_wannabe]

Well I'd get rid if you definitely can't find the necklace. I had the same with a maid, my wife wanted to sack her after similar things happened a few times but I said no, no she's nice. Then she started a fire to try to cover up a few k pesos she stole, could of burned the whole house down. Not worth the risk, soon as you suspect something just get rid. Not like the necklace has magically vanished if you don't have any other people in your house that could of took it.

[Jollygoodfellow]

1 hour ago, fillipino_wannabe said:

Not like the necklace has magically vanished if you don't have any other people in your house that could of took it.

Yes but did you bother to read about some other thing missing which turned up and also the same thing happening before this maid?  Lets ask the OP why the maid is no longer at her long time job from before? 

[Clermont]

I'm in agreement with JGF, give the girl a break, she worked in her last employment for years and if she was a thief i'm sure her last employee would have wised you up. Another thing, you have put up two other scenarios that are a possibility but instead of entrapment, just have a good family conversation with her in attendance about your stance on thieving and trust you bestow on the family and make her feel as though it is part of her job to teach the children what is wright and wrong.  

4 hours ago, OnMyWay said:

Update.  Trash goes out early in the morning so I decided to check my desk trash can, again.  I had checked it earlier today but did not go quite all the way to the bottom.  I dumped the bag out and what the heck, the 32 gb card was at the bottom!  And actually, the card with plastic on it was separate from the cardboard because I had ripped part of the cardboard off when I wrapped it with the phone for Christmas.

So on we go......  I have no idea how it got in the trash can.

 

3 hours ago, Jollygoodfellow said:

I think that the issue is most likely your own end. If the maid worked for someone since 14 then and if she was a thief it would have been over long before. You have kids as you say and have lost things before only to find later like just now the 32gb card.

Give the girl a break 

Don, be careful about branding a maid with the tag of a thief, it sticks with them for life and with no actual proof, you could be branded yourself. 

[OnMyWay]

5 hours ago, Jollygoodfellow said:

I think that the issue is most likely your own end. If the maid worked for someone since 14 then and if she was a thief it would have been over long before. You have kids as you say and have lost things before only to find later like just now the 32gb card.

Give the girl a break 

I agree for the same reasons.

[sonjack2847]

1 hour ago, Clermont said:

I'm in agreement with JGF, give the girl a break, she worked in her last employment for years and if she was a thief i'm sure her last employee would have wised you up. Another thing, you have put up two other scenarios that are a possibility but instead of entrapment, just have a good family conversation with her in attendance about your stance on thieving and trust you bestow on the family and make her feel as though it is part of her job to teach the children what is wright and wrong.  

 

Don, be careful about branding a maid with the tag of a thief, it sticks with them for life and with no actual proof, you could be branded yourself. 

Yes we should remember that most of us live by the law of "innocent until proven guilty"

[sonjack2847]

5 hours ago, Gary D said:

sounds like a bit of entrapment is required.

I don`t agree with that,why try to make somebody less honest by putting a great temptation in their way.