Can a leopard change its spots

[expatuk2014]

I must be doing something wrong ! Been here since 2011 and i love it here ! Yes its not the UK with its underground cabling and fish and chips ! But hey this is not the UK ! Yes it has its funny ways and a must for paperwork  ! Relatives are family same as in the UK ! Yes here food wise its Breakfast then Merienda then Dinner then Merienda and then Lunch ! And we have learnt not to try and eat out on weekends between 11am till 2pm ! If we need to go to the malls its weekdays only !  Noise is everywhere dogs,Chickens,motorbikes etc . But im used to it ! Not going back to the UK !

As the saying goes " home is where your heart is "  and my heart is in the Philippines

[stevewool]

Thanks everyone for taking there time to comment on here.

Well the house is back to some sort of normal , everyone has gone back to there homes and after a few hours of cleaning and then the laundry and shopping we are ready to chill out, plus the best thing I am feeling a lot better and my bottom problems have gone, nothing is ever good when you are feeling unwell.

After a few Harsh words with Ems about this and that and we have not come here to be treated like this it may have sunk in who knows.

The house project is a holiday home for when ever we want to come here, and now I have learnt that don’t come on birthdays, Christmas and new yearned other school holidays the rest of the year may work out fine for me. 
I am missing getting out into the countryside or fresh air if there is any , but hopefully we can get out sooner , a car hire for 20,000 peso a day has come our way so i May look into that a little further .

I hope I am not coming across as hating the Philippines, I have not been here long enough to say that , but I do understand about your home being far enough from family , thanks again everyone .

[Eddie1]

5 minutes ago, stevewool said:

a car hire for 20,000 peso a day has come our way so i May look into that a little further .

Hope that's a misprint on your part Steve, if not then the locals really are enjoying your visit, lol.

[stevewool]

43 minutes ago, Eddie1 said:

Hope that's a misprint on your part Steve, if not then the locals really are enjoying your visit, lol.

Yes a misprint 2000 a day.

[Mike J]

21 hours ago, stevewool said:

Believe me when I say I am trying to change my ways but it seems it’s only going one way ,

Hang in there my friend.  Those expats who seem to enjoy living here are those who "accept" these Philippine behaviours and irritations that seem to come most every day.  Those that end up continually frustrated or angry are those who feel the need to "change" either themselves, those around them, or the culture.  Change comes hard for most people, acceptance maybe not so much.  Just my opinion of course.

And of course, you can always vent here on the forum.  

Edited January 2, 2020 by Mike J

[stevewool]

8 minutes ago, Mike J said:

Hang in there my friend.  Those expats who seem to enjoy living here are those who "accept" these Philippine behaviours and irritations that seem to come most every day.  Those that end up continually frustrated or angry are those who feel the need to "change" either themselves, those around them, or the culture.  Change comes hard for most people, acceptance maybe not so much.  Just my opinion of course.

And of course, you can always vent here on the forum.  

Thanks Mike, and I do hope people understand that I want to be here and venting my frustration on here really does help me, maybe not help others who may read it and think BLAH blah blah.

Funny thing is since the crowds and noise has left I have settled back down and this morning out with my camera waiting for the sunrise , it’s going to be a beautiful day.

[scott h]

13 hours ago, stevewool said:

I hope I am not coming across as hating the Philippines,

Not at all, just the normal culture shock. That, and over night you went from being King of your own castle to being a serf working the land . 

[Tommy T.]

41 minutes ago, stevewool said:

Funny thing is since the crowds and noise has left I have settled back down and this morning out with my camera waiting for the sunrise ,

It also helps a lot when you aren't running to the loo every few minutes... Just keep trying to think always positive - it's amazing what the mind can do for you...

[TimL]

3 hours ago, stevewool said:

Thanks Mike, and I do hope people understand that I want to be here and venting my frustration on here really does help me, maybe not help others who may read it and think BLAH blah blah.

Funny thing is since the crowds and noise has left I have settled back down and this morning out with my camera waiting for the sunrise , it’s going to be a beautiful day.

Glad things are semi-normalizing for you.
 

You’re really not saying anything that most of us haven’t experienced and felt as well at one time or another. It’s definitely a completely different animal over here. The rules I try to live by here are, accept that this isn’t where I came from, never, never, never be in a hurry here and accept that there will be a lot of outside pressure on me to do or give what I’m not prepared to do or give. Blow off the small stuff and hold your ground on things that you believe strongly. I’ve only been here for 17 months. No idea if I will make 5 years or not but, I am trying. Haha...

 

Good luck, hang in there Steve. Things will get better as you get more used to them. 

 

 

[Marvin Boggs]

iDK Steve, I hope I'm not off base with this advise.  But I think you should just assert yourself into the situations that bother you.  Sure, there is a long way we can go to adapt to the way things are done.  On the other hand, I insist on eating with a fork.  And mama knows she may as well put the knife out for me too, since I'll ask for one.  When I see something that is unhealthy, I always point it out privately to my wife, for example cooking over charcoal in those cheap aluminum pots.  I don't expect everything to change....but I know they respect my ideas as a foreigner.  Not to mention, I am indirectly paying for a lot of the things that end up getting done.  A few days ago, I asked for the 4th time, why they don't try growing grass around the little barangay house rather than sweep dirt every morning?  Finally got some traction with this, as it prompted a discussion with one of the Tita's who actually has grass in her yard.  Turns out there IS a variety of grass that will grow, well well whatya know....

Once in the middle of the night, I was about to leave and go find a hotel because the damn dog would not shut up.  Complaining had not produced any result, but turning on the lights and getting my clothes on got results.  I think there are certain standards of behavior, cleanliness, or what have you and it is OK to insist on them.  Your experience may vary.  Wife has expressed to me before that she is so glad that we insist on certain things.  She knows the family is better for it, and I think others are starting to understand that as well.