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2 hours ago, peterfe said:

Hmm... no replies here. Maybe nobody's interested in this phenomenon. Well, just wait a couple of years, and it may be coming to a beach near you! About 20 years ago, I used to sometimes read in the papers in Norway about these middle-aged and older women who went to Gambia for sex, so I just thought I'd look up some more recent information. It seems it has expanded a lot - they now go to a wide variety of places, including Pattaya, Phuket and Bali. Philippines next on the list?

Ok...I'll jump in.

I suppose there is an instinctive dislike of old men with young women because of the belief that it's a relationship based on money/benefit than pure feelings so an element of unequal power comes into play. When the genders are reversed, the power balance is distorted.

It's like when we read about the male teachers caught with their female students - who doesn't feel disgust? Yet, when it's a female teacher with a male student the comments are often along the lines of "lucky him" or "wish it had happened to me". Again, it seems the perceived power influences how we think.

I'll throw one in closer to home for many of us here - an older guy with a much younger wife from the same country won't attract as much negativity as the same but where the female is from SE Asia. All about the perceived abuse of power which is distasteful to most.

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We are definitely not a "men only" forum.  The reality is that a large majority of expats living in the Philippines are male and that is reflected in the makeup of the posters.  Multiple members here

We do have a very well liked and respected expat western lady member. Queenie is somewhat inactive lately but she still stops by now and again.

I remember Julia and of course Queenie. I would imagine Julia being Filipino ( if I'm correct) may well of tired of some comments and criticism's aimed at Filipino's by some Expats. Queenie

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Before I came here a few of the women I know had sly digs about the reasons younger women here go for older guys, mainly revolving around money.  As luck would have it I was in a well mixed group of men and women, most of the men were around my age. I went around the room asking the guys that were divorced how much money their ex wives took off them on divorce. Everyone had been screwed for pensions, shared bank accounts, the home etc.  I took pleasure in pointing out that they might find it is Western women that seam to be after the money more than Filipinos. It soon shut them up.

 

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12 hours ago, hk blues said:

All about the perceived abuse of power which is distasteful to most.

Yes, I would agree about the power aspect. I'm also wondering whether it's now (like so many other things) politically incorrect to say that you don't disapprove of relationships between older men and much younger women. Around the year 1972, before political correctness, I read in a Norwegian women's magazine about a relationship between an 80-year-old man and a single mother (probably about 26-27) with three very young children. Both man and woman were Norwegians. Highly unusual, which is presumably why I still remember it after almost 50 years. Anyway, the point is that the woman said she was very happy in the relationship, but that her friends disapproved "because he'll die long before you". Then there was a comment by an expert of some kind, presumably a psychologist or marriage counsellor, which was entirely positive towards the relationship: "Who knows when any of us is going to die?" I remember she said.

Maybe I'm wrong, but I doubt whether the expert today, almost 50 years on, would have been so positive. Or if she had been, whether the editor would have asked her to at least add some negative points. And I expect the expert today would have brought up the possibility that the man might have an abnormal interest in the children, which was not mentioned back then.  

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There really is no rocket science involved guys (and girls)... just good old nature.  :whatever:

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  • 2 weeks later...

Although I haven't seen her comment in a long time there's also forum member Julia.  She has posted some insightful stuff in the past.

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2 hours ago, Balisidar said:

Although I haven't seen her comment in a long time there's also forum member Julia.  She has posted some insightful stuff in the past.

Julia is a FB friend although we have not communicated for a long time. I dont think she would mind me sharing this from a chat in 2017.

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i tried to stay active there at the forum but most of the topics there were hardly my thing - felt like i don't have much ideas to share, i felt so unqualified to voice my opinions - and sometimes if i have any opinion at all, i felt like it was not worth sharing at all...

:tiphat:

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I remember Julia and of course Queenie.

I would imagine Julia being Filipino ( if I'm correct) may well of tired of some comments and criticism's aimed at Filipino's by some Expats.

Queenie a non Filipino, contributed some interesting posts but has since decided to step back and just occasionally visit the site.

I guess that the Ladies find more interest from sites like FB and therefore choose not to visit or post.

As for older men with younger wifes/ GF's there has been a few debates on that subject which boils down to .......each to their own.

If the shoe fits and feels comfortable why not...... but it should work both way's. :tiphat:

Edited by Kuya John
Early morning spelling!
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