Smiling faces.... Are Filipinos truly friendly? Do you have Filipino friends?

[Kuya John]

It's not what you say, it's the way that you say it, that makes the difference.

Interesting reading and experiences stated, it takes all kinds to make a world.

In the twenty years visiting Philippines I have seen a lot of changes in both culture

and construction, not all for the better with Western influences.

But as my signature say's......I've not given up hope for this world yet.

 

Edited January 2, 2021 by Kuya John

[Gandang Smile]

2 hours ago, Jack Peterson said:

 You Maybe, but in my many years here I have nothing to say that bad about them, I don't get any so called Treatment but then, I don't strutt about or Quote my Means, many, many Foreigners her and sad to say you are beginning sounding to be on that street, Look at me I can employ and I can Fire, My friend, when people shout I am and can do is it any wonder they become targets Life is a two way Street But..................... Success can be found from others failures, Blaming others is not  (to me anyway)the way Forward but each to our Own. Let's hope you get a bit more success with life in the Future, For me this Topic is done with because, because I am a happy Bunny who can see both sides and feel no pride in continuing to pull these people down   

I think you're not getting the story straight and there's no need to patronise anyone. My life in Davao was but a chapter and I am fully over it. The experience did make me cynical and realistic about what these people really are and do. If you are a Happy Bunny because, like 99.9% of Western foreigners here, you retired peacefully around Dumaguete and had limited interaction with the locals, apart from maybe your wife's family, then more power to you.

Based on my own experience and that of countless of foreigners, old and young, who came here to do a bit more that retire, I can see the Filipinos' shortcomings as much as can see my own.

 

Edited January 2, 2021 by Gandang Smile

[Gandang Smile]

1 hour ago, TerryP said:

I can understand why you are so keen to get back to Italy now

I hope you can find your way back there very soon and your wife can be much happier there than you are in the Philippines

I will be stay here if there's a reason to be here. I can work from Italy or anywhere else, so we will see what happens after C's masters.

The elephant in the room remains, though: for how soft and compassionate we want to be when judging them, it's Filipinos themselves who are the most critical about their own country, their own society, the way their affairs are run.

Those who are the wrong side of privilege go abroad, if they can. Those who can't and have to stay here try to brave the situation the best way they can. Some of the lucky ones, usually young women, hope to escape on the wings of a foreign partner.

[Gandang Smile]

1 hour ago, Shady said:

If PH was like other countries you wouldn't see foreigners flock here, when the reality is quite the opposite, because the PH Is unlike most nations.

There is an inherent competitiveness in many North Asian countries that is entirely lacking in the PH. Similarly, the fact that PH is demographically homogeneous makes it entirely different than the culture of Western nations.

That perceived friendly, easy and inexpensive way of life is exactly what drew me here, like - I believe - it did with most of you guys here.

It's true that the collective spirit here is not one of hard work, excellence and competitiveness, like it could be in Japan and maybe China. People here simply live and let live. Sometimes, a bit too much, to the point that that passivity and frugality that we foreigners seem to love end up being the country's downfall.

1 hour ago, Shady said:

It's basically an oligarchy, an elite class and a lower class. It's that lower class that most foreigners deal with, and consider friendly. As I said because of their upbringing, not seeing their neighbor as competition, but as one of their own. That's embedded in the culture, and it's actually shocking to anyone from the West who's been here for any length of time.

Just one example, if your taxi driver needs to ask directions from someone that they clearly never met before, watch the interaction, smiling, patient, helpful.  Now compare that to a random Western interaction.

That lower class most foreigners end up deal with is exactly the type of people I would only consider superficially friendly. And that bayanihan ("cooperative spirit") I also believed was at the basis of their best behaviour, is also very fragile and inconsistent most of the times.

Yes, the taxi driver will be given directions by passer-bys and the guy with the tire stuck in a ditch will be promptly helped out by total strangers. At the same time, these tend to be the same people who stop talking to each other over inheritance matters, who shamelessly leech on the OFW auntie or daughter, or on the foreign man who has married into the family.

I have been here for more than 5 years now and I just find it hard to put the rosy goggles back on.

Edited January 2, 2021 by Gandang Smile

[Kuya John]

11 minutes ago, Gandang Smile said:

Filipinos themselves who are the most critical about their own country, their own society, the way their affairs are run.

Just for the recordI have never come across an OFW here in UK who is not proud of their country....no matter what anybody else thinks!

[stevewool]

Do you have Filipinos friends ,

Well yes I do, we have known each other since my first visit to the Philippines and on our last trip there we saw each other most days just for a chat as he was a close friend to the family too, as a trike rider he was around the house most mornings and came back for his break and we got on so well as he was into lots of British music from the early days plus he was into photography too, plus he was always there to help with the language barrier if it was needed as some members of the family refused to talk in English .

But alas when we went away to see friends for a few days , he was told by some members of the family  not to come around the family house anymore , Why you may ask, well some members did not like him talking to me and they thought he was telling me things that should not have been happening in the house , which he was not .

Like I said we still talk on the internet , here is a picture of my mate Arnold.

[Gandang Smile]

9 minutes ago, Kuya John said:

Just for the recordI have never come across an OFW here in UK who is not proud of their country....no matter what anybody else thinks!

Sure, they are proud of their country if they miss it, and their families, their food, their traditions... They certainly miss the good stuff about the Philippines and being a Filipino.

I think it's human nature, after all: nostalgia paints our memories with the sweetest colour and we tend to forget the dark hues that motivated us to leave in the first place.

It happened to me when I left Italy for London, too.

Reality remains, that most lower-class Filipinos tend to feel entitled to a share of whatever other people have. Maybe it's bayanihan twisted to its extreme. Maybe it's just ignorance mixed with greed. I just don't like to be involved with people who behave by this principle.

 

Edited January 2, 2021 by Gandang Smile

[Eddie1]

42 minutes ago, stevewool said:

Like I said we still talk on the internet , here is a picture of my mate Arnold.

Ah yes, instantly recognizable!!!

[graham59]

I really do think that cementing their friendship by wearing a pair of Steve's underpants on his head is a bit over the top though.  

[graham59]

Here are some smiling faces I encountered yesterday afternoon, at a neighbour's just up the road:  

.

 

 

( I wasn't asked for any money or 'favours' by these 'lower class' people. )

Edited January 2, 2021 by graham59