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Up shit creek


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Well here was I sitting minding my own business yesterday evening and Emma was talking to one of her sisters and all of a sudden Emma said ‘ You don’t like my family’ , well where did that come from I asked , apparently the sister told Emma that .

So where as all this come from I asked , her cousin who lives  in London who has a partner and child was holidaying in Abu Dhabi and was visiting this sister and her partner told them that I don’t like them , but I’ve never spoken to this bloke , he’s not my cup of tea , anyway Emma knows my thoughts on the family and I am sure many of you know my feelings too, but nothing has happened in a few years that has made me voice my opinion to the family over there , I was trying to get to the bottom of this and told Emma why was my name brought up in conversation surely your sister had to ask about me and what her and his thoughts are about me , anyway me and Ems are both fine and I know where I stand concerning the family an outsider and I’m happy to be thought of that way , it’s just making me think if we visit the the Philippines again I’m not seeing the family but I will not stop Emma seeing them 

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Issues with family seem to be a common problem when married to a Filipina.  My wife is so discouraged with some of her siblings that we have discussed moving to another area to get away from family.  Both of us are about fed up with the "damned if you do, damned if you don't", "what have you done for me lately" attitude.  It can be a challenge for sure.  Fortunately my wife sees what we have contributed to family as opposed to what they think we should contribute.  The saying "No good deed goes unpunished" comes to mind.  Best of luck.  We are considering moving after my mother-in-law passes just to get away from the this $hit.  Sorry end of rant as this is your story, not mine. :sad:

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4 hours ago, stevewool said:

all of a sudden Emma said ‘ You don’t like my family’

I get that sometimes.  Most often when they want money and I discourage that or when she wants to go up in the mountains where they poop in the jungle and I say I will stay in the city.  The girls get over it, or they don't, but its their problem.

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Typical juvenile-level attempted manipulation, seen frequently in Filipino family interactions.

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4 hours ago, Guy F. said:

Typical juvenile-level attempted manipulation, seen frequently in Filipino family interactions.

Agree.

It's an attempt to force Em's to choose sides and feel guilty. The foreigner or family? It's money related most likely.

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Having been married to a Filipina and now being happily single I feel fortunate and somewhat blessed that I dont have any of this "interfering/nosy/gossippy/"why doesnt the white fellow give us some of his money" etcetc nonsense.

They have an endless fascination with other peoples money ( yours ! )  and talk endlessly about it and sure as hell carp when whitey doesnt share what he probably worked long and hard for.

Everyone CAN work , but not everyone CHOOSES to do. 

 

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By the way Steve sorry you have to deal with this. It's sure to be difficult for Em's as well. 

Over the years most of us have been in your situation one way or the other. :sad:

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My Filipina got over it after about 20 years of marriage. My saintly patience paid off.

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Thanks everyone for your comments and support, like I said we are fine , and I know Ems does suffer for her love for her family, I just don’t seem to see it coming back to her from them , being so many miles away from them plus me being in charge of the purse strings does help me I’m sure 

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17 hours ago, Old55 said:

By the way Steve sorry you have to deal with this. It's sure to be difficult for Em's as well. 

So true.  It is my wife who ends up feeling the grief, abuse, and hurt.  :sad:

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