Marriage or not, opinions welcome

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Bruce
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Posted (edited)

Well, the short version is ..... DON'T DO IT! Rent / long term lease option to buy is a much safer! There is a reason that a divorce is very expensive.... Why??? .... Because they are worth it! In the alternative, talk with a Pinoy attorney about a prenup to see if legal in Phils AND, this is the important part..... Hire a different attorney to represent the soon to be wife so she can not later complain she did not know what she was signing. She signs 2 times. the 1st to acknowledge she got a copy to read and then AT LEAST 30 days later she signs to accept and agree to the prenup provisions. This gives you the option to argue, if you have to divorce her later, that she had a minimum of 30 days between getting a copy and talking to her family and friends as well as 'her' lawyer to better understand the document and what it means to her, before actually signing the 2nd time to accept it. This is important for you (damn) foreigners who may have kids already and wantr to leave them something just to find out when you are dead, the 'new' wife has manipulated things for her benifit and your kids are left with nothing, nada, zip, buttkiss...... Mozel tov!

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scott h
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Bruce, that comment was about as helpful as a nun at a bachlors party. I dont know who crushed your soul, but most of us are "happily" married to filipina women, and I for one take offense. I suggest that the moderator (after he removes this post due to the flame nature) move your comment to a new thread where others of your mind set can sniviel and whine together about how you were taken advantage of by the gold digging sluts of the Philippines.

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Bruce
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Scott! You got me all wrong. I have yet in my life to have a bad break up or nasty divorce and I get along very well with the Pinays.... Never a bad experience. I try to choose women 'wisely' not hormonaly........ HOWEVER......... I take a rather pragmatic and direct non emotional approach to many things (most) that I see. The answers I posted above, may have nothing to do with you or pertain to you..... While you claim offense and see no use in my post reply.... there are others reading it and saying ... Bruce! Where the hell were you BEFORE I got married! Why didn't you tell me this back then? Whilst I am not an attorney, and in no way giving legal advice.... I suggest you read my post reply again and maybe you will see that what I posted is actually very sound thinking to prevent a very bad potiential problem. Remember that there are 2 sides (at least) to any love story....... Never forget the absolute most attractive thing about most of us (damn) foreigners is __________? And without that or enough of it, in many cases.... as we all are familar hearing about..... the romance soon dries up...... What! You thought it was my stunning phsyique? Nah... I am short and big pot belly..... My wonderful laugh? Nope wrong again... very nasal sounding. My wit and good sense of humor? Not a chance.... So what is it that attracts Pinays who I have never even met to me? What is is that causes 100,000+++ Pinays to sign up on the internet dating services??? (actually, 'they' seem to rather like my narrow nose! I can't see it myself, but who am I to complain?) What is it that 'we' represent to the average Pinay that attracts them? Like a moth to a light....... So I think my original post answer was 'spot on' from a preventative maintenance view point..... Offending someone never even crossed my mind (this time).....

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Mr Lee
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OK I move the above posts here because this topic is about should people or shouldn't they, so feel free to give opinions here but people (Bruce especially) should remember that many of us are happily married to lovely Filipinas, so while you may feel it would be a bad idea to marry, or marry a Filipina, that was not what the last topic was about, since the people who asked me about marriage, wish to get married, so they only wanted to know how, and not if they should, but members should feel free to discuss the positives and negatives here, but please without insulting each other over choices we have made, or wish to. Now to reply to Bruces post, not all Filipinas marry for money, I know this for a fact because I happen to know many who refuse to marry a person just because they have money and some wish to feel a real connection before jumping into the frying pan. Marriage is a two way street and many of the women who marry foreigners end up dead or getting beaten or more or less isolated from the world. How do I know this, because I have seen it first hand. So the women are taking their chances as well, and if you have been reading this forum, one member Hugh Cave was said to have killed his wife and buried her, and then gone on to his life in the Philippines, only to end up arrested and brought back to the US to face the music.Topic about Hugh Cave HEREpost-40-0-77103000-1317427083_thumb.jpg

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scott h
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thanks Kuya, i let my emotions get in the way of my better judgement

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Travis
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at this point in my life living together is probably the route I would take

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Garpo
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While I agree with much of what Bruce has to say about possible problems with marriage, I do however wonder what he would suggest in the case where the Filipina fiance is from a very rich Filipino family and has a hell of a lot more to lose than the out of towner that wants to marry her? I am not so sure that I would want to hear about a prenum in that case.

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