Great Friday

[Inspector]

So, last night I check on my dog/pup outside, and see he is in a still stance with his hair up and looking cautiously at the side of the house where it is dark. I am thinking a cat at first, or maybe the Patton roach, waving his colt .45 at the dog who is deciding if he should check out just how painful a general roaches bullets are. So, I look closer, and the only thing I can see is a still mass outlined as a silhouette against the sweet and sour diesel flavored Philippine air. I can't make out what this thing is....Jaba the Hut or a large crap from an elephant? I begin to think hard of all the Discovery Channel shows I have watched and wonder if the Philippines has elephants, a smaller pinoy elephant able to fit in a larger jeepney, but quickly rule it out because my gate is too small for any to fit in, and I remember reading somewhere India having the smaller versions. So I then tell my GF about the strange object, and she says she will get her cell phone.... which also acts as a flashlight, camera, cork screw, air pressure gauge and taser. iPhone my arse, can yours stop an 800 pound grizzly in it's tracks? So, as she is looking for the light, the pup and I decide to move a little closer to the mass. As we get a little closer, the still lump suddenly jumps. This caused myself to jump, the pup to jump, and all the kids playing in front of the house to jump. Finally the flashlight/taser/phone arrives, and upon closer look, it is a frog or toad...one of the dangerous GIANT philippine frogs, about the size as a large Hyundai ...also VERY toxic. So I get the pup out of there, go back inside worried, start to think my options... and after consideration of all the ramifications, I begin to work a deal out with the general. I feed Patton some sugar and tea, and ask a deal... for all the food he wants, will his army of roaches attack and destroy the evil samurai toad hanging in the gutter outside?... knowing in my mind, I would destroy him and his army after I have used him for my stop the hop plan. He thinks about it, laughs in my toe and crawls on my foot. After I scream and run away, I begin to feel frustrated and in need of a vodka martini. I decide I have no choice but declare a war against two opponents now, and two fronts...outside the house and in. I sleep last night thinking of my course of attack this morning and my resources and self morale to the task, but to my surprise, a good Friday becomes great, as the giant toad is no longer on the side of the house. Sure, he hopped through the block wall, taking down all the cloths hanging lines and my only clean underwear I had, but even if I have to wear a streaked pair of undies for a day, not having a hopping Michael Moore lookalike on the side of my house threatening my dog was well worth it, and this truly is a GREAT Friday. Oh, and my PSA reading 6 months ago went from a usual yearly physical of .5...to a 8.2 on a visit of ejaculation pain and peeing dribbles 50 times a day. Two follow up tests it was a 5.8 and a 2.6. The urologist back in the states said the cipro was working, but it needs to be below 1.5 as of yesterday or the biopsy and needle was next up....being it was always a .5Of course as all us old farts know, prostate issues are a big deal as we age. So, after the visit to the Chong Hua lab yesterday and NO wait, it was a .458...back to normal. PSA test stands for panic stress and anxiety test more often then not...and wow, what a relief hearing that it was indeed an infection called prostatitis. I also had my blood type checked, not able to find it in my records I took here...for those who may need it in any emergency.A positive. If you need it, I will require some cookies in exchange as my blood is NOT free. :cheersty: