Head Scratcher

[Dave Hounddriver]

2 minutes ago, jpbago said:

Ask Dave H what he would do

I would marry her, and then get divorced in 2 years and give her a little more than half of everything I possess.  At least that is what I have done in the past.  How about you?

[jpbago]

1 minute ago, Dave Hounddriver said:

I would marry her, and then get divorced in 2 years and give her a little more than half of everything I possess.  At least that is what I have done in the past.  How about you?

Just teasing you.

[Mike J]

15 minutes ago, Dave Hounddriver said:

I would marry her, and then get divorced in 2 years and give her a little more than half of everything I possess.  At least that is what I have done in the past.  How about you?

I hear you my brother.  Been there, done that, got the t-shirt, using it to wash my car.  And more than once - I was a slow learner I guess.

[Old55]

Yep, I do feel your pain guys. Been there done that.

 

[Snowy79]

I go along the lines that if she's not talking she's planning. 8 yrs is a long time together but from my experience jealousy followed by silence is a bad thing. I can only go by Western standards as I don't give anyone here a chance to try emotional blackmail. Life is too short. If she got angry and wanted to know everything and discussed it I'd say she's a keeper, but if she's not willing as has been said the seed has been planted. 

She's now got something to throw back at you anytime she feels she wants to, and sad to say she might look on it as an excuse to have a little bit on the side herself even though you know what you did was with good intentions. I'm sure every married person that's had minor fall outs with their partners over something has been reminded of it countless times, in this case I think Filipino pride will take it to a whole new level.

It's your shout. Hang on in there and it may work out or you could end up worth a lot less than you are now. Only you know if you can afford that. Not just financially but emotionally. 

[intrepid]

5 hours ago, Dave Hounddriver said:

I would marry her, and then get divorced in 2 years and give her a little more than half of everything I possess.  At least that is what I have done in the past.  How about you?

Haha Dave, I haven't done it myself but I had a co-worker many years ago that had been married four times and was about to go for the fifth.  Just before it became too late, he made this comment.  " I should just find a girl I hate every two years and buy her a house.  I'd be better off!"  Got a lot of laughs but I think in his case there may have been some truth to it.  I never have forgotten it.

[Old55]

I'm having second thoughts about what I suggested.

After eight years of happiness the relationship you both shared is worth saving one would think.

Is there someone of true authority in her life she would really listen to like her Father or a Priest that together you can work this out one way or the other. If she is unable or unwilling to truly trust you and let this go I think you will be better off leaving because your relationship is over.

 

Edited May 7, 2017 by Old55

[Jake]

Hey guys, I re-read Cave Man's post and locked on the word "support".  For many locals, that usually means like supporting a family with one or more of your "offsprings".  

If this relationship is worth saving, perhaps a threesome get together and discuss the truth, which may be still hidden?  

[Dave Hounddriver]

On 5/6/2017 at 10:03 AM, Caveman20 said:

Not a word from her in a week...not one. What the heck?

Caveman20,

I see you have been back to the site to read the comments, so I would like to ask if the situation has changed.  It seems you were having more of a rant than seeking advice, but inquiring minds like to know, is she speaking to you again?  Did you work it out?

[mogo51]

On 5/6/2017 at 9:54 AM, Dave Hounddriver said:

There is appropriate tipping and then there is tipping that will cause gossip.  You found out that "handsome tipping" does not pay off for you or for any of the other customers.

People I know will tip anywhere from nothing (tightwad Aussies) to 150 pesos for a very good, legitimate massage.  I usually leave about 100 if I leave content.  Now if you are leaving "happy" then you may be leaving 1000 pesos and if anyone sees you leaving 1000 tip (or hears about it) then you will get the rumor mill going that you are getting extra service spyou "like that girl"

Best of luck sorting that one out :-)

Why are Aussies 'tighwad' as you suggest Dave.  Tipping is not common in Australia and is only there at all due to North American 'bad habits'.  I have several massages a week from a woman in Pattaya who is excellent, my SO also goes regularly to her, so we give her a good regular income - that is helpful for her.  I give her a small tip each time as an appreciation.

I have no wish to be a 'hotshot' by splashing money around or 'big noting'.  Americans ruin every country they go to by excessive tipping, which reduces the quality of service and it soon becomes an'expectation'.  

I realise that 'tipping' in America is expected as the employers fail to pay appropriate wages - something I could never understand.