Who will take care of you?

[Lee]

 

My wife and I think about this everyday.

Her family can't even help themselves. If we asked any of them to help us with the day to day stuff, we could expect to be taken advantage of/stolen from at every turn.

 

At the very least, the reward for this is seeing the loved ones finishing their studies and looking forward to a promising future. However, there is no guarantee that those who were supported will end up as hoped for. Some, unfortunately, wasted the golden opportunity and simply took advantage of the love extended.

But there is a much higher cost, a heavier price for going all out for others when this is done without regard to one's own future, especially when getting old. It is therefore vital that when we take care of others, we do not forget to take care of ourselves, too.

For example, it is not uncommon for breadwinners to work extra-long hours to get ahead in their careers and earn more. But sometimes, this is overdone to the detriment of well-being. In the long run, if left unchecked, this can backfire, leading to health issues that will eat up needed funds from the limited budget.

When growing a family, the focus is the present, the current situation. The present always has a long list of expenses — cost of living, education, health, travel, etc. But expenses are never-ending, regardless of stage of life.

Because of our deep sense of responsibility, we are so busy taking care of others, especially our children, that we set aside or worse, forget to plan for ourselves, like preparing for our retirement.

When we retire, we lose our primary source of income. We may receive some retirement benefits from our employer and from social security. However, as statistics always confirm, they are not enough. Increasing health care costs, higher inflation, and lower investment yields add pressure to our retirement income. On the other hand, a longer life expectancy means outlasting our funds. What happens to us then?

Who will take care of us when we grow old? I do not think we want to be an added burden to our children. They have their own families to support and their own dreams to pursue. I do not believe we want to depend on charity and lose our dignity. I do not think we can rely on the government. Even if it wants to extend help, it does not have the resources.

Who will take care of us when we grow old? The simple and hard answer is, we are to take care of ourselves. Since we cannot expect others to do that for us, we must put serious thought into how we want to spend our golden years. We should take time to plan for our retirement even as we provide well for our loved ones. It is not going to be easy, but the consequence of not doing it is going to be far more difficult.

I recommend adding a "retirement fund" item to your monthly budget. You can make use of autosave or auto invest programs available in financial institutions. You can start small, just to develop the habit of setting aside for retirement. I suggest reading good materials about retirement so you will have a better idea of what are the necessary steps to achieve a happy retirement. It will also be valuable to seek professional advice.

As I have shared in a previous column, planning for retirement, specifically saving for our senior years is not selfishness. When we retire happy, everyone is happy. Ourselves, as we bask in our new phase of life. Our loved ones, as they see us truly enjoying ourselves. The government, because we do not depend on welfare.

The author is a former president and CEO of two life insurance companies, AIA-Philam Life and BPI Philam Assurance Co. He was also the president of the Philippine Life Insurance Association. He is an advocate of retirement planning, personal leadership, gender diversity and inclusion.

Who will take care of you? (msn.com)

[MikeyD]

This really resonates with me.  One of my assumptions about moving to the Philippines was that my wife would re-connect with family and friends and we would have options not only for day to day support (both giving and receiving) but also in the long term I thought we would find others that we could trust that could provide support as we grow older even if we needed to pay them.  Now, after being here for almost (only) 9 months I think my assumption was wrong and it seems like family and friends that are better off financially don’t really want to connect with us and those that are less fortunate view us as a walking ATM.  We haven’t met anyone that we can really trust.  At this point I can’t really think of what we are going to do as we age and get to the point where we need help other than to hire someone that we don’t really know or trust.  Still, we have a better shot at that financially here in the Philippines than back in the US.

[Gutenberg]

8 hours ago, Lee said:

When we retire, we lose our primary source of income.

I hope that doesn't mean I have to retire! My business is online based and I work with my laptop - since roughly 20 years. I can't even imagine just leaving that and not doing that anymore. The only case I see here is if my brain develops some illness. Doesn't run in the family though, all sharp until the end.

[stevewool]

After reading this , it reminds me of the old saying , I’m alright Jack !  That seems to be the best way looking forward or get yourself a very young caring wife .

[Possum]

A friend of mine said he hoped his demise would be caused by being shot in the act by a jealous husband when he was 90. Didn't work our for him but the father of a mutual friend did die at 85+ falling from a hotel second floor balcony after being pushed by his room mate's boyfriend. We found that inspirational.

[JJReyes]

My wife and I are, at the present time, independent living seniors.  When we are no longer able to take care of ourselves, we will move to the Philippines.  The main reason is professional caregiver service is affordable compared to the United States where senior living, memory care, and nursing homes can cost $8,000 to $12,000 per month.  This is for a 120 square foot room with one attendant caring for 6 to 18 residents during her shift.  They are so busy there is no time to change adult diapers.  Maybe once every two days.

We know someone who rents a two-bedroom apartment in Metro Manila, for a comatose relative, using a round-the-clock team of live-in nurses.  A medical doctor, who resides in the complex, visits once a week.  The air-condition runs 24/7.  Liquid nutrition is provided through a feeding tube.  Total cost?  Less than $5,000 a month.

The above is contingency planning.  We joke that it might be better to be hit by a speeding bus.

[Dave Hounddriver]

12 hours ago, JJReyes said:

We joke that it might be better to be hit by a speeding bus.

Doesn't have to be speeding.  They will back up over you to be sure and get it right. 

[Lee]

13 hours ago, JJReyes said:

Less than $5,000 a month.

Where in metro Manila does the patient live?  Thanks.

[JJReyes]

11 hours ago, Lee said:

Where in metro Manila does the patient live?  Thanks.

Near Alabang.  

[Hestecrefter]

This might get me expelled as being in bad taste and showing altogether unacceptable imagery.  But that's okay.

When we have far more miles behind us than ahead of us, this is something we all should consider..

.

 

 

Dying With Dignity 

I have already informed my family that  I will not be able to afford an expensive  nursing home, which would allow me to  die poor and very old . 

I have therefore moved  to Costa Rica so that I can spend my final years enjoying life and dying with Dignity!

 

*

 

*

Oh, by the way, Dignity said to say hello!