Natives Feelings About Non-Tagalog Speaking Filipino

[aio]

When I was stationed in Korea, I had a full bloodied Korean friend who was also in my squadron. He however did not speak any Korean as he was raised in the states, similar to me. Anyway I asked how the natives felt about him. He said that they looked down on him because he could not speak his native languare. So my question is how will the Filipinos perceive me, because I sure don't speak the language?

[TheMason]

If you are a Filipino that knows Tagalog but prefers to speak in English, I think you'll be considered snobbish and treated accordingly. If you are a Filipino who knows only English, you'll be treated like any other foreigner. Once they realize you don't know any of the native languages, I doubt they would consider you a Filipino no matter what your outward appearance is.

[Gold Heart]

If you are a Filipino that knows Tagalog but prefers to speak in English, I think you'll be considered snobbish and treated accordingly. If you are a Filipino who knows only English, you'll be treated like any other foreigner. Once they realize you don't know any of the native languages, I doubt they would consider you a Filipino no matter what your outward appearance is.

I can offer an interesting perspective in that I am very often mistaken for Filipino. My heritage is like Obama with parents of mixed race. Wherever I am when enter stores, restaurants, cabs, etc. people begin speaking to me in Cebuano. They are taken back when I apologize and say that I am sorry that I don't know the language. They then say that they are sorry that they thought I was Filipino. Followed with discussions of interest of where I'm from. Most people don't seem to look down on me. In fact, and my wife confirms, There is a greater respect for English speaking people here. Also there seems to be a high respect for foreigners here. Which is one down side for me, I don't get the respect that most other foreigners would get. If someone is serving a group of people, they would focus and pay attention to the most respected amoung them, for example the order of serving in a restaurant. I find in general there is a greater acceptance of differences here than anywhere else I have known and visited.One down side of not knowing the language is that people, although they speak English and quite well, are afraid to speak it. Perhaps because of the way it is taught, they seem afraid of making a mistake and being judged. The reality is, and I often tell many, they speak English better than a lot of Americans.There is also a respect for elite and people with money. My wife finds it difficult or uncomfortable to associate with people of wealth. There is acceptance of the low level cast system here. In the ways of the old US South, People know and accept their place. Attending a recent concert here, it was all the humor when the Comediennes made fun of the people in the front rows -- the more expensive seats. One proclaimed, you people in the balcony are my people -- you people next to me at the stage are friends of the headliner ( Lea Salonga). It was all in Cebuano so I had to have my wife interpret and I did not quite get the humor.Once I learn a bit of the language, look out!

[Jake]

When I was stationed in Korea, I had a full bloodied Korean friend who was also in my squadron. He however did not speak any Korean as he was raised in the states, similar to me. Anyway I asked how the natives felt about him. He said that they looked down on him because he could not speak his native languare. So my question is how will the Filipinos perceive me, because I sure don't speak the language?

Hello Aio,From my own personal experience after enduring 7 years in PI, I came back to the States frustrated with anger as well as sadness and remorse. Basically, I was too Americanized. Thinking back, I believe my downfall was that I was immature with my foolish and impatient ways of handling day to day interpersonal activities. Thinking back, I believe I became prejudiced against my own people, even against my own relatives. I could remember one of my close Filipino friendsasked me in Tagalog why I continue to speak "dollar". I just didn't care anymore.Oh sure, the first several weeks was like a honeymoon period, treating them out and donating money to pay for theirdaily needs or wants. But eventually, I announced that I was no longer Santa Claus and quickly shut them off. I refusedto accept the culture of multiple or extended family members living under one roof. They refused to accept the conceptthat my immediate family was my highest priority. That culture differences escalated to the point where I became extremely agitated and eventually returned to the States defeated and sadly, without my wife Judy. Thank god, that isall in the past and everything is all good now.Now the question remains -- why do we want to go back there again? Basically, it's a matter of financial stability. Lookat Art and his wife Jho living comfortably just on his pension(s). As we all approach our senior years, we need to learnto relax and enjoy today and not sweat the little sh.. of tomorrow. I don't know about you guys, but I'm tired of worryingtoo much about simple things now. My wife and I now realize that immediate family does comes first but will continue tosupport other extended family members in cases of real emergencies. I promise myself to smile more often, to offer random kindness and always be thankful that my lifelong companion has provided me the happiness that I took for granteda long time ago. Respectfully -- Jake

[Mr Lee]

Guys and gals, I think the main issue we all face is that we are considered rich and it will be very hard, if not impossible to convince our families that we are not. I do not think the language is the main problem and I do think as Jake said that English is associated with rich and maybe high class and probably separates you Filipino guys from your families because if it. I am of course not Filipino so I guess I do not know what difficulties you face if you do not speak the language but if that language is Tagalog then Rosetta Stone sells a package to train people and it would probably be advisable to learn as much as possible, if not to speak, to understand what is going on around you. I speak Cebuano poorly and maybe like a baby but I find that family and others appreciates it when I at least try and I do understand a lot more than I speak but I really have to concentrate to understand as it does not come natural to me. Example, a kano spoke some Cebuanao to me and since I did not expect it to come out of his mouth and since he spoke it very differently than a Filipino would, I missed it totally even though I knew the words he used. I would highly suggest everyone learn some of the language to help us fit in but even more importantly to help us know what is going on around us because sometimes that can be fun and other times it might save our lives.Now back to the money issue, I think it is important that guidelines are set from the start once you retire. If you had been sending money all along, then it is time to tell the family that the faucet is now shut off since your income has dropped tremendously and you will now only only be able to afford to support your own family (wife) and yourself and also maybe have for real family emergencies. So what is a real emergency, I have found that it is a medical emergency that can be verified by a phone call to a doctor or hospital and once we started asking for names and numbers those so called emergencies seem to be reduced to almost none. Next I also think it is best to live far away from family but not too far that you cannot visit them, but that is just me and because I do not wish to have people dropping in to stay all the time. Each person will have to seek out their own level they can accept.Sorry to cut into this thread with my thoughts, because of me not being a Filipino but I really think money issues will be much harder to deal with and the language can be learned if you really try hard to and if this old kano can manage to learn some of our families language, then I am sure you younger guys can learn some as well if you really put your mind to it.Good luck with your family issues guys.

[Art2ro]

When I was stationed in Korea, I had a full bloodied Korean friend who was also in my squadron. He however did not speak any Korean as he was raised in the states, similar to me. Anyway I asked how the natives felt about him. He said that they looked down on him because he could not speak his native language. So my question is how will the Filipinos perceive me, because I sure don't speak the language?

You'll probably be the only one that will feel selfconscious about not being able to speak the Filipino language just because you look native and can't speak the language. I know, my older brother can't speak the language either and he felt the same way when he's amongst our Filipino cousins, but as long as they get accustomed with you and know that you don't speak a bit of Tagalog, they themselves will try to revert to English in order to mingle with you! Don't let it bother you, because most Filipinos will envy you for your fluent English in the first place and try to converse with you in English the best way they know how or will just politely ignore you if they can't speak English with you! So while in the Philippines, see if you can pickup the language and if not, you'll just have to live it! Between the age of 12 and 20 I no longer spoke the Tagalog language, because English took up my time in school, but I still understood it fluently and it took me 3 years to pick it up again and speak it fluently when I was stationed in the Philippines at Clark Field way back in 1968! Since retiring in the Philippines in 1998, Tagalog is the only language I speak in our home 95% of the time, the other 5% is with other English speaking Filipino expats from different parts of the U.S. and Canada who recently retired here in our subdivision. Just do your best to learn the language! And Jake, thanks for the plug buddy! I know where both you and aio are coming from, because I've been there and did all those things way back when! I was just persistent and lucky that's all! BTW I joined the forum because my English was getting rusty after all these years!P.S. And if you have problems with your extended family, just put your foot down, cut the money flow and or move further away from them, simple as that! That's what I did and it worked! Just take care of your immediate family and don't worry about the rest, they survived before and they will again away from them! Just help those closes to you and your wife only when you are able! Good luck guys!:no: Edited February 4, 2010 by Art & Jho

[tropicalwaste]

Acceptance at a lower level in society is much easier to get along with. Generally I find neighbours, drivers etc. have no real issue of just being one of the guys.But I do think there is an arrogance within what would be a social middle class such as realtors and doctors they simply assume they can rip you off and charge double and a smile makes everything ok if they are caught out. Doesnt mean alll Filipinos are like that but can someone point me to a doctor or realtor who isnt trying to overcharge or sell me something that isnt needed? because I havent met one yet. Lawyers and judges on the other hand havent hand any problems with as its purely business maybe because they are looking for ongoing business rather than grab the cash and run. Im part of an airsoft team who dont speak much english but as I say to them its not theyre fault im in the Philippines I need to learn Cebuano if they are in the UK they need to speak English... But we get invited to family gatherings, fiestas and birthdays. Its more of a small community and if wanting to intergrate more getting into a sports club may find yourself some "real" friends.Would I be respected more if I speak Cebuano or Tagalog? well if you speak Tagalog in Cebu they still see you as a tourist and vendors etc will no doubt give you a higher price on tourism related goods etc. (As some of our relatives from Manila can contest). But I dont think its important to speak Cebuano not as much as it is to listen and understand Cebuano as most people talk about you to your face knowing you cant understand what they are saying. My Cebuano is improving and you do hear some strange things from people serving you at a mall for example. But that also encourages to learn more words..lolDo I want to be treated like a local? my answer would be I would like locals treated more like me. I will queue even though the bank manager will come and drag me out of the queue, I will not sit at the head of the table in a restaurant where everyone expects me to pick up the tab, I dont get drunk, smoke or sleep with prostitutes which is something some Filipinos have asked me about as "most foreigners do in theyre eyes" they look at me confused and say "You have no vices?" Its not that I dont drink by the way but have cut back on it a lot only drinking socially such as the Fiesta that is coming up this month. Its important to remember there are so many Expats that drag the name of "Expats" into the gutter so living a more clean living and being aware of the fact people expect you to be of a negative nature is important to change the way people see us. Same as not being such a walk over when it comes to overcharging but that takes time to know your being over charged!I think if you speak Cebuano or not is a small piece of the puzzle of acceptance, but also being aware that people assume you can just wave a magic wand and get on a flight back to your home country if need be to restock money or up and move permanently. Something most other people around you cant. You will no doubt be accepted in some form but to be accepted as a local in the same way as Filipino to Filipino may be unlikely or impossible as so many people have views of you that you havent even thought of.

[Art2ro]

Acceptance at a lower level in society is much easier to get along with. Generally I find neighbours, drivers etc. have no real issue of just being one of the guys.But I do think there is an arrogance within what would be a social middle class such as realtors and doctors they simply assume they can rip you off and charge double and a smile makes everything ok if they are caught out. Doesnt mean alll Filipinos are like that but can someone point me to a doctor or realtor who isnt trying to overcharge or sell me something that isnt needed? because I havent met one yet. Lawyers and judges on the other hand havent hand any problems with as its purely business maybe because they are looking for ongoing business rather than grab the cash and run. Im part of an airsoft team who dont speak much english but as I say to them its not theyre fault im in the Philippines I need to learn Cebuano if they are in the UK they need to speak English... But we get invited to family gatherings, fiestas and birthdays. Its more of a small community and if wanting to intergrate more getting into a sports club may find yourself some "real" friends.Would I be respected more if I speak Cebuano or Tagalog? well if you speak Tagalog in Cebu they still see you as a tourist and vendors etc will no doubt give you a higher price on tourism related goods etc. (As some of our relatives from Manila can contest). But I dont think its important to speak Cebuano not as much as it is to listen and understand Cebuano as most people talk about you to your face knowing you cant understand what they are saying. My Cebuano is improving and you do hear some strange things from people serving you at a mall for example. But that also encourages to learn more words..lolDo I want to be treated like a local? my answer would be I would like locals treated more like me. I will queue even though the bank manager will come and drag me out of the queue, I will not sit at the head of the table in a restaurant where everyone expects me to pick up the tab, I dont get drunk, smoke or sleep with prostitutes which is something some Filipinos have asked me about as "most foreigners do in theyre eyes" they look at me confused and say "You have no vices?" Its not that I dont drink by the way but have cut back on it a lot only drinking socially such as the Fiesta that is coming up this month. Its important to remember there are so many Expats that drag the name of "Expats" into the gutter so living a more clean living and being aware of the fact people expect you to be of a negative nature is important to change the way people see us. Same as not being such a walk over when it comes to overcharging but that takes time to know your being over charged!I think if you speak Cebuano or not is a small piece of the puzzle of acceptance, but also being aware that people assume you can just wave a magic wand and get on a flight back to your home country if need be to restock money or up and move permanently. Something most other people around you cant. You will no doubt be accepted in some form but to be accepted as a local in the same way as Filipino to Filipino may be unlikely or impossible as so many people have views of you that you havent even thought of.

In my opinion, I don't think it really matters if you can speak any of the Filipino dialects or not! I myself only speak the basic Tagalog language at the elementary grade school level and I get by with it! Anyway, the majority of the Filipino population can speak basic English depending what part of the Philippines you live! If some of you live in rural areas, they may have not been exposed to the English language, but it is now mandatory to teach the English language in most Filipino schools, because the Dept of Education of the Philippines, now knows that teaching young children as they progress in school, may have a brighter future in getting decent employment here and abroad since nowadays, the English language is now the universal language around the world! Do you know, that there has been an influx of Japanese and Koreans coming to the Philippines just to learn the English language? That's because the majority of colleges and universities in the Philippines teach in the English language, also tutors anyone in English by bilingual Japanese, Korean and English instructors and it's cheaper to come to the Philippines from Korea or Japan to go to school here. The Chinese and people from India is a different story, I believe most of them migrated to the Philippines for just business purposes for the most part and they all knew how cheap the cost of living is here in the Philippines was their 2nd reason and the rest were refugees from different parts of South East Asia! The Japanese and Koreans didn't come to the Philippines to learn the Filipino language, but of the English language taught by Filipino instructors! Some thought, learning Mandarin Chinese was the way to go! Hey, the Chinese government too pays in "peanut" scale like wages like the Philippines do! Just kidding! But it's true isn't it? :hystery:So, it's really no big deal if you can't speak one bit of the Filipino language! Filipinos just have to speak with foreigners in English if they want to drum up business in order to get some of your dollars, Euros, Pounds or yen! Well, that's just my opinion for whatever it's worth! :thumbs-up-smile: Edited February 5, 2010 by Art & Jho

[Heart]

my personal experiences would speak how a bunch of friendly and hospitable people Filipinos are...i find it especially kind when they try their best to comprehend you and also return English answers...I've learned from a friend that in some areas they have this "carabao english" thingy and its great to realize that even people from rural areas have English skills.i love Filipinos :):thumbs-up-smile:

[UZI]

Acceptance at a lower level in society is much easier to get along with. Generally I find neighbours, drivers etc. have no real issue of just being one of the guys.But I do think there is an arrogance within what would be a social middle class such as realtors and doctors they simply assume they can rip you off and charge double and a smile makes everything ok if they are caught out. Doesnt mean alll Filipinos are like that but can someone point me to a doctor or realtor who isnt trying to overcharge or sell me something that isnt needed? because I havent met one yet. Lawyers and judges on the other hand havent hand any problems with as its purely business maybe because they are looking for ongoing business rather than grab the cash and run. Im part of an airsoft team who dont speak much english but as I say to them its not theyre fault im in the Philippines I need to learn Cebuano if they are in the UK they need to speak English... But we get invited to family gatherings, fiestas and birthdays. Its more of a small community and if wanting to intergrate more getting into a sports club may find yourself some "real" friends.Would I be respected more if I speak Cebuano or Tagalog? well if you speak Tagalog in Cebu they still see you as a tourist and vendors etc will no doubt give you a higher price on tourism related goods etc. (As some of our relatives from Manila can contest). But I dont think its important to speak Cebuano not as much as it is to listen and understand Cebuano as most people talk about you to your face knowing you cant understand what they are saying. My Cebuano is improving and you do hear some strange things from people serving you at a mall for example. But that also encourages to learn more words..lolDo I want to be treated like a local? my answer would be I would like locals treated more like me. I will queue even though the bank manager will come and drag me out of the queue, I will not sit at the head of the table in a restaurant where everyone expects me to pick up the tab, I dont get drunk, smoke or sleep with prostitutes which is something some Filipinos have asked me about as "most foreigners do in theyre eyes" they look at me confused and say "You have no vices?" Its not that I dont drink by the way but have cut back on it a lot only drinking socially such as the Fiesta that is coming up this month. Its important to remember there are so many Expats that drag the name of "Expats" into the gutter so living a more clean living and being aware of the fact people expect you to be of a negative nature is important to change the way people see us. Same as not being such a walk over when it comes to overcharging but that takes time to know your being over charged!I think if you speak Cebuano or not is a small piece of the puzzle of acceptance, but also being aware that people assume you can just wave a magic wand and get on a flight back to your home country if need be to restock money or up and move permanently. Something most other people around you cant. You will no doubt be accepted in some form but to be accepted as a local in the same way as Filipino to Filipino may be unlikely or impossible as so many people have views of you that you havent even thought of.

Hi Matt,Well said. I speak a little Tagalog (used here in Laguna) but it is enough for when I am asked if I can. I love the smile & impressed look I get and the atmosphere warms up noticeably. They know I don't NEED to know so appreciate that I made the effort.I am like you, I understand WAY more than I can speak.............and Heart, yes it is VERY easy to live here isn't it :thumbs-up-smile::cheersty:UZI