Pseudo Vs The Real Philippines

[UZI]

When coming to live in the Philippines, we have 2 or 3 choices when it comes to WHERE. Some choose to live alongside the ordinary Filipino in the community, some in Condo's & some in Sub Divisions.I have lived in Condo's in Malaysia and although ok for temporary, I wouldn't choose it for long term.When we came to live here, we bought our house in a nice sub division built by Avida (part of Ayala) with houses to western design & standards, with guards at the entrance to control entry & exit, convenience of shops within walking distance like Jollibee, Shakeys,Chowking, Mercury Drug etc, Meat & Veg market too and a Hospital close by. All the things a westerner needs. We lived there for 4 years and couldn't wait to get out. Why? It also 2 faced people, with fake lifestyles, living on credit cards & bank loans.Now don't get me wrong, we also had (still do) some very close friends there who also chose their friends carefully, strangely though they were all 100% Filipino.Our 1st intro to this fake lifestyle came as we were moving in when a neighbor voiced her surprise that we hadn't bought a corner lot like hers as it was bigger & that I had a 2nd hand Toyota Surf rather than a Ford Expidition like hers (we all know the sort). Well they lasted a few months & the car was towed away & then they did a moonlite before the bank got there. Following that we had a FilAm women who is Queen Bee & along with the wife of another FilAm spend every night around the pool with Tsismis, gave her opinion on how we should have our house improved & we were doing it all wrong. To the Irish friend who a few weeks ago found out that his Filipina wife had not paid the bank but instead spent the money spoiling her brat lazy kids. Another moonlight & P8 million in debt. All around the estate are half built houses left incomplete for lack of funds for their grand designs but lots of new cars. One European guy we knew never did anything but sit outside his house reading books because his live in Filipina, spends all his money. Most have 2 or 3 maids / yaya's who have such an attitude problem & sit around texting or chikka with each other. All the residents, looking down on normal Filipinos as a race apart.This for us wasn't the REAL Philippines but a Pseudo Philippines which was more like the Saudi Arabian style compounds which are insulated from the outside. Maybe this is due to many ex military who are used to living on bases.So we have now moved to a house in a quiet cul de sac in Cebu. Does it have its faults, of course. Will there be fake 2 faced people, of course but and it is a big one, there are many many more who are genuine, happy, friendly people around us & a community that you will NEVER get on a Sub Division IMHO.So choose carefully. Are you coming to the Philippines to experience the Philippines & Filipinos or do you want to transpose your Texas or California or Sydney or London etc lifestyle here.As the saying goes, different strokes for different folks.Uzi.

[Mr Lee]

When coming to live in the Philippines, we have 2 or 3 choices when it comes to WHERE. Some choose to live alongside the ordinary Filipino in the community, some in Condo's & some in Sub Divisions.I have lived in Condo's in Malaysia and although ok for temporary, I wouldn't choose it for long term. When we came to live here, we bought our house in a nice sub division built by Avida (part of Ayala) with houses to western design & standards, with guards at the entrance to control entry & exit, convenience of shops within walking distance like Jollibee, Shakeys,Chowking, Mercury Drug etc, Meat & Veg market too and a Hospital close by. All the things a westerner needs. We lived there for 4 years and couldn't wait to get out. Why? It also 2 faced people, with fake lifestyles, living on credit cards & bank loans. Now don't get me wrong, we also had (still do) some very close friends there who also chose their friends carefully, strangely though they were all 100% Filipino. Our 1st intro to this fake lifestyle came as we were moving in when a neighbor voiced her surprise that we hadn't bought a corner lot like hers as it was bigger & that I had a 2nd hand Toyota Surf rather than a Ford Expidition like hers (we all know the sort). Well they lasted a few months & the car was towed away & then they did a moonlite before the bank got there. Following that we had a FilAm women who is Queen Bee & along with the wife of another FilAm spend every night around the pool with Tsismis, gave her opinion on how we should have our house improved & we were doing it all wrong. To the Irish friend who a few weeks ago found out that his Filipina wife had not paid the bank but instead spent the money spoiling her brat lazy kids. Another moonlight & P8 million in debt. All around the estate are half built houses left incomplete for lack of funds for their grand designs but lots of new cars. One European guy we knew never did anything but sit outside his house reading books because his live in Filipina, spends all his money. Most have 2 or 3 maids / yaya's who have such an attitude problem & sit around texting or chikka with each other. All the residents, looking down on normal Filipinos as a race apart. This for us wasn't the REAL Philippines but a Pseudo Philippines which was more like the Saudi Arabian style compounds which are insulated from the outside. Maybe this is due to many ex military who are used to living on bases. So we have now moved to a house in a quiet cul de sac in Cebu. Does it have its faults, of course. Will there be fake 2 faced people, of course but and it is a big one, there are many many more who are genuine, happy, friendly people around us & a community that you will NEVER get on a Sub Division IMHO. So choose carefully. Are you coming to the Philippines to experience the Philippines & Filipinos or do you want to transpose your Texas or California or Sydney or London etc lifestyle here. As the saying goes, different strokes for different folks. Uzi.

Good assessment and points IMO Uzi but I would like to add my own comment. If a person is new to the Philippines then they may want to first learn some about it while living in a condo or gated community and then once they know their way around, then decide if another lifestyle might suit them better.  For my wife and I, I had grown up in apartments with my family and always wanted a house, so when I got married for the first time, that was what I had to have. Later on in life I went from house to house while in the US, and while living in the Philippines part of the year we found ourselves living in the provinces in our families homes or going from hotel to hotel. I found that I did not like that lifestyle, so we tried out a condo and found we really liked it, so much so that my wife and I have now been looking for a condo in Florida so we can have a place to come back to and to continue to share our time in both places while waiting for the economic recovery to hopefully come about. Condo life sure is not for everyone and I find myself mixing with people from all life styles both Filipino and non Filipino, so I do not feel it is just about where you live, I feel it is more about who we are and how approachable we make ourselves, and how carefully we pick our friends.  Different strokes for different folks. 

[UZI]

Good assessment and points IMO Uzi but I would like to add my own comment. If a person is new to the Philippines then they may want to first learn some about it while living in a condo or gated community and then once they know their way around, then decide if another lifestyle might suit them better.

Lee, Totally agree. If new to the Philippines, then a Condo or rental on a sub division is a safe place to start exploring for sure. Long term though, it is too imitation faux Philippines for me, although if you love city life then a condo will always a great base, not a choice if you like the country / suburbs though. Uzi Edited July 19, 2010 by UZI

[Inspector]

Well, I am living among the locals....and I can't wait to be in a sub division. Reason? I am simply TOO popular....wherever we go walking our dog I am surrounded by 100 kids and many ladies, and the Kingswood basketball team. My GF says a lot of the popularity is because of my size....around 260 pounds and muscular, and many have not seen a man that large. I feel it is because I wear creed irish tweed cologne, a cologne that can cause straight men to turn gay for the evening. I grew up in NYC, and the provinces have more people in the jungle then a city block....the peace and quiet of a guard at my sub division, provided it aint a deca type homes place, is very appealing. If I didn't have a dog, I would be in a condo....actually, I would move in with Lee and not move from his lazy boy recliner. :welcome11:

[UZI]

actually, I would move in with Lee and not move from his lazy boy recliner.

Inspector, On that we certainly agree. Couldn't do without my Lay Z Boy Real Philippines or not

[Jake]

UZI,OK, there goes the neighborhood. My own personal interpretation of your post was more like 95% criticism and 5% suggestion ("so choose carefully -- yada, yada, yada...."). How does that help the new members?? Please explain based on your experience on howto deal with the so called aristocrats or fake neighbors living beyond their means. You caneasily voice your opinions on this forum but have you voiced your concerns directly towards the neighbors that bother you? Is there a manager of the sub division you could take your complaints to? Are they valid complaints or just nasty gossips going around among the house maids? Please, a little more constructive criticism would be most appreciated.Jake

[UZI]

UZI,OK, there goes the neighborhood. My own personal interpretation of your post was more like 95% criticism and 5% suggestion ("so choose carefully -- yada, yada, yada...."). How does that help the new members?? Please explain based on your experience on howto deal with the so called aristocrats or fake neighbors living beyond their means. You caneasily voice your opinions on this forum but have you voiced your concerns directly towards the neighbors that bother you? Is there a manager of the sub division you could take your complaints to? Are they valid complaints or just nasty gossips going around among the house maids? Please, a little more constructive criticism would be most appreciated.Jake

Jake, Not sure what you want from your post. "Constructive criticism"? Not really my place to tell people to stop pretending to be something they are not and spending money they don't have. These are my POV and personal experiences, relayed so that others can weigh the pros & cons of where to live. I posted it on 2 forums & most members identified with it, like this comment:

Great observations Uzi, and inline with my own thoughts and previous postings on this subject. The farther we moved from the upper crust, the more fulfilling and troublefree the life we found.

As for some of the people I referred to, I suggest you reread my post. They were all people I know and the maids observed personally. Unlike some who had nothing better to do, this isn't gossip. Forum posts can be discussions, where members exchange their experiences & POV, so Jake how about you adding your suggestions to help new members.

Please explain based on your experience on how to deal with the so called aristocrats or fake neighbors living beyond their means.

I stayed away from them, as I found out what they were (or thought they were) & then left for a different type of people. As a FilAm, how would you have dealt with it? Would you really go to the HOA Administrator (Manager) to complain? About what? Owners not finishing their houses within a set period? What would you expect him to do? For us, we are just loving seeing people (adults & kids) greeting us with a smile all the time and as we visit our house construction, it is nice for people to ask what this is or what are we doing there etc, showing interest not looking down their noses as if they are better than you. These are our PERSONAL experiences, shared for others to agree or disagree with. To add their own as Lee did about Condos, to this thread as they wish.BTW, on a personal note, not all were like that on the sub division, as I pointed out in my OP. In fact we had a phone call yesterday from a Fil Canadian & his wife to see how we were & look forward to seeing them when they visit Cebu. Unfortunately half a dozen genuine people we knew were in the minority. Uzi.

[Jake]

I guess this could apply for any neighborhood, no matter where you reside. How to deal with un-neighborly neighbors rather than move out? Apparently they got the better of you. I'm just a little curious on how you're going to avoid similar situations at your new sub division. As a Filipino-American, here is my way to criticize but have offered some suggestions:Dated Feb, 2010http://www.philippin...indpost&p=18572 Jake

[UZI]

I guess this could apply for any neighborhood, no matter where you reside. How to deal with un-neighborly neighbors rather than move out? Apparently they got the better of you. I'm just a little curious on how you're going to avoid similar situations at your new sub division. Jake

Jake, We were & still are very good friends with our neighbors as I said in my original post. We didn't like the general attitude of the majority. No one 'got the better of me' as you put it. Also as stated in my OP, we are NOT on a sub division now. Good to see you offer a different approach to life's situations as does Mr Lee etc. The more POV the better for readers to get a wide view of life here rather than a narrow blinkered one. Uzi in Cebu

[ekimswish]

I lived in a squatter area for a month on top of a hill, and that was interesting. I loved playing ball with the local kids on the lower, dunkable, hoop. I liked the stars at night, and the jungle feel of the place. Felt a bit like Rambo. Didn't like 10 people are so eating breakfast with us in the morning. Didn't like the lack of privacy, but didn't mind the occasional drinking get-together at night. It was nice chatting up poorer Filipinos and hearing where they're coming from. It was really hard to sell them my story of being "relatively poor" by Canadian standards! lol... I gave up on that. We're moving to Leyte in November and have a few ideas of where to live. The first thing we'll do, probably, is set up a decent quality nippa house on our farm for 30~50k. They tell us 30k, but I imagine it'll reach 50 or 60. Then we'll decide if we want to do one of those rent-to-own schemes in a sub-division near Tacloban, or build a house on her lot in the small town near our farm. The other possibility is to rent for a while in the city, but the wife's against it. I wouldn't mind. I'm not sure I want to live in her hometown, however. Small town life seems like it'd get a bit sketchy. From what I hear, they like to gossip a lot, and if someone is doing well, the others like to try and bring them down. On top of being violent, she's not really selling me on the town, aside from we already own the lot. Oh yeah, and without question, there are a select few who will try to borrow from us at every chance. What do you guys think? House on her lot in the small town or rent to own in subdivision or rent in the city for a while? Whether we live there or not, we'd like the nippa hut on the farm for the occasional overnight stay.