What Are The Reason For You To Leave The Philippines

[Elena]

Hi all! Sorry my english is bad. My husband and I 47 and 45, are planning to come to live in the Philippines. Reading the forums noticed that a lot of expats lived in the Philippines 5-7 years return to their country back. We visited three times a month or more, and we liked the country. We are not starry-eyed, but it may have something that the tourist does not see, but it becomes apparent only after a long stay. Share your thoughts.

[Bruce]

One of the most common reasons for leaving is simply the refusal to adapt. The Philippines is full of ... well, I am having trouble with words here due to your being Russian and not English as a 1st language.... But there is a lot of wasted time and effort in most all that is done here. Limited deductive reasoning and problem solving skills.... Hope that is not too much for you to translate.

 

Many of us from a 1st world country try to 'improve and fix' things... Not going to work well here. So there is a lot of frustration on the part of us trying to fix things when our words are accepted but there is no action or improvement. Mostly that is when we start using the 'stupid' label. But that is not really the problem.

 

The problem is 'us' not accepting the status quo. Once we foreigners start accepting things as they are and only change things that may effect us directly, then we can start to live well.

 

But many refuse to see or accept that. They and try and try to make changes then they GIVE UP and go home..... Mad and Angry and frustrated! Never realizing that it was their attitude and not the attitude of the local people that must change.

 

I really was impressed by JJ Reyes in another post about how his father explained the workings of the household helpers to JJ's new wife (40 years ago).     

 

Those few paragraphs by JJ should be REQUIRED READING of anyone wanting to stay more than 21 days.

 

Then next big reason people leave is being scammed by a potiential wife and then blaming all women in the Philippines and going back home mad...... Or a variation of this. But tis sghould not be a concer if you are with your husband.  

 

And a bit of simple advice on speaking to people... Especially your husband....

 

COMRADE!  Speak softly..... Russian, while not near as 'harsh' as Hebrew, is somewhat of a stronger language. I have, as a nurse had conversations with patients and nurses alike complaining about Dr XXXX and his attitude. Well he did not have an attitude. He was speaking English as a 2nd language and his 1st language was a 'harsh' language and as such he spoke English in a harsh tone with out ever realizing it.  

 

People in the Philippines smile and agree, but not near as much if your tone is harsh due to your primary language skills.

[JJReyes]

You need to have a purpose in life or a good reason why you want to move to the Philippines. After a year or more enjoying the warm weather and beaches, it may get boring. Then you will start to notice all the things that are wrong about the country.  

 

Speaking from my own experience, we lived in Makati. While the Philippines has wonderful beaches, it would take several hours to get there from Metro Manila. So careful planning was important. Moving to Honolulu, Hawaii, there are beaches everywhere. One study found that you can live anywhere on the island of Oahu and the closest beach is 30 minutes away. From our home, Waikiki is 8 minutes. From my Waikiki office, I can walk along the beach during my lunch break.

 

The first year, we prepared a picnic basket and spent Sunday at a different beach (there are 127 different beaches on our island). By the second year, it became less and less. Now we only go to the beach when we have visitors. Similarly, as a student in Los Angeles, all my visitors wanted to get to Disneyland. After many visits, I would drop them off at the gate and return in the late afternoon. Disneyland became boring and expensive for me.

 

Bruce does charity work. He found a community that is grateful for his help even if it is just buying breakfast at Jollibee, the local version of McDonalds. As a retired nurse, Bruce has knowledge to share with other nurses and provide medical help to those in need.

 

I am working on several possible projects involving the Philippines. These projects will require several visits a year. However, my long term goal is slightly different. My wife and I have enough savings to enjoy a simple, comfortable life as active independent seniors anywhere in the United States or anywhere in the world. This is living on a budget, but there is enough. What we cannot afford in assisted living and skilled nursing care prices in the United States. We plan to move to the Philippines if either one of us requires care services because the costs are lower. Our financial strategy is the money we have for active, independent retirement in the United States is enough to pay for care services in the Philippines.  

[Adventurer]

Elena, I would recommend if you haven't already that you both go and visit the Philippines first and travel around for a month or two. It can take some time to get over the honey moon period, nice beaches (in outer areas), friendly people and relaxed way of life. After that you will start to see negative things which are different for each person. For me it was blood sport, boxing is big there and you will often find the whole country including females all stopping their life to watch two guys try to kill each other. They will also do they same thing on a smaller scale for roosters. This reflects on the whole society and human life is not that important as people are brought up that killing is no big deal. Besides, if you do wrong there you can just go to the Catholic church and all will be forgiven....Then there is the pollution in the cities, the filth, the poverty, the starving children everywhere and the crime. Then there is the corruption, the dirty sexy trade and one of the things that I find shocking is the low pay people are paid that is part of the root of the problems there. Often people will work 18 hours a day 7 days a week for 20 pesos (enough to buy a tiny bag of rice) after they pay for their transport and food costs.

 

There have been similar problems in Russia so maybe it might not be such an eye opener.  Then there is the danger of becoming a target as a foreigner you stand out in the crowd and can become a target for crime especially if you live in the wrong place or are out spoken and could annoy the wrong person. Also kidnapping is a realty in some areas. You might also find it hard to accept that many locals will just see you as an ATM machine too and even people you think are friends will eventually show their intentions. Unfortunately the foreigners that have gone before you have helped make it this way by throwing money and their weight around and have hurt and upset many locals and given foreigners a bad name to many local people.

 

After you can accept all these things then the Philippines can be an amazing and great place to visit or live.

[Guy F.]

I know one couple who moved back here because her family made life too miserable for them by asking for money and getting nasty when enough money was not forthcoming. Another couple returned to the states to earn enough money to satisfy her family. I wouldn't want to be them.

 

My biggest worry is the noise and pollution. Have you noticed roosters are omnipresent in residential areas? Also, there are no zoning laws. Someone could start a piggery or a disco nearby and you would be out of luck. When we began shopping for property I was afraid we would have to settle for someplace I could just tolerate. We got lucky and found a piece of land I'm really excited about eventually living on.

[MikeB]

After that you will start to see negative things which are different for each person. For me it was blood sport, boxing is big there and you will often find the whole country including females all stopping their life to watch two guys try to kill each other. They will also do they same thing on a smaller scale for roosters. This reflects on the whole society and human life is not that important as people are brought up that killing is no big deal.

Wow, that's quite a statement. Professional boxing is big everywhere, not just the Philippines. It's also a tightly regulated sport. Over the many years of it's existence there have been a few deaths world wide but there have also been many rule changes to protect the boxers. They are far more likely to die on the roads then in the ring. It has some popularity here (as elsewhere) but I think you've greatly overstated it.

[Adventurer]

They are far more likely to die on the roads then in the ring. It has some popularity here (as elsewhere) but I think you've greatly overstated

 

you missed the point which is that the country is obsessed with blood sports and human life is not so important, it has nothing to do with boxing as a sport, I could not care less if they want to kill each other in the ring.

[Bruce]

After that you will start to see negative things which are different for each person. For me it was blood sport, boxing is big there and you will often find the whole country including females all stopping their life to watch two guys try to kill each other. They will also do they same thing on a smaller scale for roosters. This reflects on the whole society and human life is not that important as people are brought up that killing is no big deal.

Wow, that's quite a statement. Professional boxing is big everywhere, not just the Philippines. It's also a tightly regulated sport. Over the many years of it's existence there have been a few deaths world wide but there have also been many rule changes to protect the boxers. They are far more likely to die on the roads then in the ring. It has some popularity here (as elsewhere) but I think you've greatly overstated it.

 

All true.... but I think that professional boxing is starting a downward turn as the medical community and the boxing community reconize that the human head was not meant to be pounded, electively at that, and there are differing levels of brain damage which only gets worse.

 

True, they are in the ring of their own free will.... or..... really? If the max salary made was $200 per fight.... how many would go 'professional'? Chasing that prise money is very powerful bait....  

 

I am not saying it should be out lawed or controlled any more than it is. Just that views are changng and boxing is getting a black eye.... :hystery:

Edited March 25, 2013 by Bruce

[Will]

Well, I've typed up (then deleted) several responses to the OP question. I don't want to sound negative, but all I can say is somethings that I found amusing when I first got here have becoming annoyances. I will leave it at that. I've been here almost 3 months with my Filipina wife and 15 month old baby girl. This is my first time in the Philippines. I am still trying hard to adjust to life/culture here. I find Red Horse helps sometimes! :)

[Bruce]

Well, I've typed up (then deleted) several responses to the OP question. I don't want to sound negative, but all I can say is somethings that I found amusing when I first got here have becoming annoyances. I will leave it at that. I've been here almost 3 months with my Filipina wife and 15 month old baby girl. This is my first time in the Philippines. I am still trying hard to adjust to life/culture here. I find Red Horse helps sometimes! :)

 

Just accept that you can not change things beyond your reach. I have heard about or talked to a few members that have moved 'away' but not back to their home countries to get away from families and demands.  

 

Buld your own place and your own lifestyle. Be your own man but at the same time, realize that some things here are not meant to be changed. So just sit back and be amused!