You're Going To What?

[BrettGC]

Dad, you've spent your whole life worrying about others' happiness, go and be happy yourself"

This I like :thumbsup: Well gone those kids. :cheersty:

:tiphat:

Yeah, they're good kids :)

[BrettGC]

When I retired in November 2009 I was working for the US Army as a civilian. Several Soldiers already knew I planned to move to the Philippines and during my retirement speech many more learned about it. The reactions from all of them were very good. Many of them wished they could retire and go with me because they knew they would be going back to the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. Retiring and living on a tropical island I thought that was everyone's dream.

I Initially worked for the Dept. of Defence here Americano. Ditched it though, wanted to make the clean break in the end. One of the reasons I left the navy was due to being deployed overseas, yet again, with the army.

I think it is everyone's dream until it comes to crunch time. Most people are happy in their comfort zone and don't want to move out of it, which is fair enough. What gets my goat is they criticise those that want to try something different to what they themselves have experienced. Projecting their fears? Possibly. Annoying as hell? Yes. I'm a live and live sort of guy and have never been able to understand why people become so bent out of shape about the actions of others that have no bearing or impact on them. Hmm, sorry, little rant, but I think most of you get what I mean lol.

(how do I turn this damn spell-checker in Firefox from US English to the original Queen's version???)

Edited January 15, 2013 by BrettGC

[JJReyes]

Friends are a mix of jealous, excited, confused. One of my old bosses was a Navy man and he hated the PI's, but he also hated Hawaii so his opinion does not count.

This is an impossibility! No one hates Hawaii.

On a more serious note, what families, friends and relatives hate is the permanence of your relocation. Your going overseas has finality. It is treated similar to death. The ability to reunite in less than 24 hours through air travel is ignore. Instantaneous communication through inexpensive international phone calls, email, skype, etc. is also ignored. It might be best to say, "I will be gone a year." If you return home after one year, you can then retire overseas forever and no one will feel bad. In fact, if you return a second time after a few years, the folks back home may say, "What! You again?"

[Tukaram (Tim)]

Friends are a mix of jealous, excited, confused. One of my old bosses was a Navy man and he hated the PI's, but he also hated Hawaii so his opinion does not count.

This is an impossibility! No one hates Hawaii.

On a more serious note, what families, friends and relatives hate is the permanence of your relocation. Your going overseas has finality. It is treated similar to death. The ability to reunite in less than 24 hours through air travel is ignore. Instantaneous communication through inexpensive international phone calls, email, skype, etc. is also ignored. It might be best to say, "I will be gone a year." If you return home after one year, you can then retire overseas forever and no one will feel bad. In fact, if you return a second time after a few years, the folks back home may say, "What! You again?"

The finality is a big part of it, I think. My sister said she always envisioned all of us getting together for vacations and hanging out after we all retire. We live in the same city and barely get together for Thanksgiving and Christmas - so where she got this idea I do not know! But our dad died 2 years ago, and one brother died last year, so there are only 3 of us left (me, sister, brother). So I try and be understanding. And I will most likely miss both my kids weddings, as well as grandkids being born (not necessarily in that order). So maybe I am crazy.... but I'm still going! :tiphat:

[Jack Peterson]

This I like Well gone those kids.

:hystery: :hystery: Of course guys, this should read WELL DONE sirry iriot :th_th7: somedays , :as-if: I can be so stupid :th_imstupid:

[intrepid]

Good thoughts JJReyes.

I will add to that alot of friends and familys preception of the Philippines has a lot to with how they react to our decisions. And, much of their preciptions come from what we tell them. Many of my friends and most of my family knew little about the Philippines before I married my and brought my wife to the US. In fact, I must admit I knew very little before my first travel there. I often wondered the same for our wives being brought out of their culture and country. It was hard on my wife's family when she first left but shortly after they learned how much I cared for her and later them also, they came around rather quickly. We have been traveling back to PI every 2 years and usually stay six to eight weeks. I'm about 2.5 years away from our move. I have told everyone and they seem to take it okay except my mother who just doesn't want to talk about it. She always thought all her children would be nearby forever. Even though she loves my wife and our daughter and will have to deal with out future move. My two adult children seem to be excited for me but latley we have all grown even much closer and I think I will be missing them. But, as noted above, with all the technical communications today, we will be able to stay in contact. Not like 20+ years ago. Plus, for me, I am lucky because I can return to the states annually if I had to. But the plan is every two years for now.

d

[Dave Hounddriver]

The perceptions formed by my friends and family members were formed by old guys who come back from Philippines with pictures and bragging stories about all the young girls they shagged. These are the sex tourists your read about. They only come here for a short time and then spend a long time telling their stories around the bar and the workplace. The people 'back home' rarely hear about the successful relationships as we are here, not there bragging and showing pictures of their exploits.

[BrettGC]

The perceptions formed by my friends and family members were formed by old guys who come back from Philippines with pictures and bragging stories about all the young girls they shagged. These are the sex tourists your read about. They only come here for a short time and then spend a long time telling their stories around the bar and the workplace. The people 'back home' rarely hear about the successful relationships as we are here, not there bragging and showing pictures of their exploits.

Pretty much sums their attitude up.

[i am bob]

I think part of the problem with acceptance from my family stems from my cousin. He had gone to the Philippines a few years ago on a vacation and met someone who he eventually married. It took a bit of time but he eventually was able to move her and her 2 children (which he has adopted) back to Canada. Where the issues come in is that she lived somewhere in the Manila area (not sure exactly where) and that they were not very well off either. Neither were her parents or the rest of the family. What I understand is that they lived in an area where life was dangerous in a daily way. So my cousin has been quietly working on getting her family all moved to Canada a little bit at a time. Now back to my family. I think that they have heard about this and think that the entire country is like the area where my cousin's wife and family are from. I have tried to explain to them that I don't even want to live in that area but rather further south where tourism is more popular. (My family would understand tourism as we are from Niagara Falls area) Don't ask me why they can't figure that out.

The other reason I feel my family is against the move is because both myself and a sister spent so long living away from the family. I was gone for 24 years and my sister lived in Australia for 10 years (a few years doing shows at SeaWorld and then a couple business start-ups) before we both ended up moving back. It's almost like some of them think that, now that I am home, I am not allowed to leave again.

I have lived a life in the military here in Canada where I was Air Force, worked and travelled a lot also with the Navy and got to spend a couple years in Europe while playing with the Army. I need somewhere new and exciting... Somewhere that makes me feel like I am still alive... Somewhere I can start my life again for the 38,762nd time like I did with all my other moves and travels. I may be 54 years old in time but my heart still says 18 is pushing it. Yes, life is for the living so I intend to live my life the way I want and the way I feel best - not some other person's idea of what my life should be! I will enjoy MY life. The life I will make for my Special Someone and I in that heavenly tropical paradise known as the Philippines!

[BrettGC]

I think part of the problem with acceptance from my family stems from my cousin. He had gone to the Philippines a few years ago on a vacation and met someone who he eventually married. It took a bit of time but he eventually was able to move her and her 2 children (which he has adopted) back to Canada. Where the issues come in is that she lived somewhere in the Manila area (not sure exactly where) and that they were not very well off either. Neither were her parents or the rest of the family. What I understand is that they lived in an area where life was dangerous in a daily way. So my cousin has been quietly working on getting her family all moved to Canada a little bit at a time. Now back to my family. I think that they have heard about this and think that the entire country is like the area where my cousin's wife and family are from. I have tried to explain to them that I don't even want to live in that area but rather further south where tourism is more popular. (My family would understand tourism as we are from Niagara Falls area) Don't ask me why they can't figure that out.

The other reason I feel my family is against the move is because both myself and a sister spent so long living away from the family. I was gone for 24 years and my sister lived in Australia for 10 years (a few years doing shows at SeaWorld and then a couple business start-ups) before we both ended up moving back. It's almost like some of them think that, now that I am home, I am not allowed to leave again.

I have lived a life in the military here in Canada where I was Air Force, worked and travelled a lot also with the Navy and got to spend a couple years in Europe while playing with the Army. I need somewhere new and exciting... Somewhere that makes me feel like I am still alive... Somewhere I can start my life again for the 38,762nd time like I did with all my other moves and travels. I may be 54 years old in time but my heart still says 18 is pushing it. Yes, life is for the living so I intend to live my life the way I want and the way I feel best - not some other person's idea of what my life should be! I will enjoy MY life. The life I will make for my Special Someone and I in that heavenly tropical paradise known as the Philippines!

I'd double like your post Bob but since I can't I'll just tell you instead.