Does She Really,really Love You ?

[Classic Dry]

Wow, we are so off topic !!!

 

Thanks for your concern and support Brett. You know, looking back, I couldn't/wouldn't have done things any differently.

Although I came to dislike the woman intensely, I didn't blame her. Remember it was I who gave her the stick to beat me

with. This was my punishment for being such a wimp.

In all other aspects of my life I felt powerful and in control, but this was my Achilles Heel. Because it was my job to

interact with her, I never shirked meeting with her. Wouldn't give her the satisfaction of knowing I was avoiding her.

In later years and with other women I was attracted to, I would avoid them when I could, and when avoiding them wouldn't

draw attention to the fact.

But this is all years ago, mate. Water under the bridge. I've grown some balls to use in that situation, and hopefully they'll

never shrink to that degree again !

[Jake]

Wow, we are so off topic !!!

 

Thanks for your concern and support Brett. You know, looking back, I couldn't/wouldn't have done things any differently.

Although I came to dislike the woman intensely, I didn't blame her. Remember it was I who gave her the stick to beat me

with. This was my punishment for being such a wimp.

In all other aspects of my life I felt powerful and in control, but this was my Achilles Heel. Because it was my job to

interact with her, I never shirked meeting with her. Wouldn't give her the satisfaction of knowing I was avoiding her.

In later years and with other women I was attracted to, I would avoid them when I could, and when avoiding them wouldn't

draw attention to the fact.

But this is all years ago, mate. Water under the bridge. I've grown some balls to use in that situation, and hopefully they'll

never shrink to that degree again !

Hey Classic Dry,

 

You threw yourself a curve ball but you manage to come back right on track - a classic move indeed.  Anyway, I can

see two major questions in this OP about whether the love is real or not depending on location: Philippines or back

to home country.  

 

A little background, if you please......

Even before WWII, the Filipino nationals were being recruited into the US Navy.  Fast forward to the current time, just

about every big city has a Filipino Town or community.  The major impact to all this was the Filipina.  Either married to

a Filipino serving the US Navy or being a baby maker to US sailors and marines, the population grew exponentially.  

 

My observation here in southern CA, where major military bases have long been established, I have seen too many

stereotyping of that same Filipina.  Whether she is wearing fishnet stockings, lurking the local bars in National City

or she is the most devoted Catholic, many comments have shed a negative light on the poor Filipina.  

 

Unfortunately, it's easy to be prejudice for many people.  They are usually uneducated and unwilling to understand.

However, those same folks will become jealous seeing you hand in hand with your new beautiful and young wife.  

Can you imagine all the gossip, even among your family members when you move back to Ireland, for example.   

 

My point to all this rambling is -- what are you going to do about it?  Newly married, do you become possessive and

jealous at the same time?  Will you over protect her?  Will you impede her further education in trying to become a

productive citizen of your home country and your new family?  Or do you become more sensitive to her anxieties in

a strange land and culture?  

 

When was the last time you open the door for her or surprise her with a single rose?  In other words, will you still be

friends and lovers for the long haul.  The ultimate question: IS LOVE REAL between two lovers?

 

Ooh yeah.....after 28 years of marriage, the flame of passion is still there, in spite what Classic Dry mentioned above.

Yeah, I hear ya -- mine have shrunk and my little swimmer jumped to another pool.  I get no respect sometimes.

Edited November 4, 2013 by Jake
spill chek

[Classic Dry]

My point to all this rambling is -- what are you going to do about it? Newly married, do you become possessive and jealous at the same time? Will you over protect her? Will you impede her further education in trying to become a productive citizen of your home country and your new family? Or do you become more sensitive to her anxieties in a strange land and culture?

 

This is an important question for those still living in their home country and wishing to take their new bride to live there.

In the Philippines she has limited access to other foreigners. Taking her to your country opens up a whole new world

for her, one in which you may get left behind.

She will change. It's inevitable. Will you nurture her and help her come to terms in her new environment ? Some will want TLC

But some will take off like a rocket. Which kind do you have ?

Possible new topic here perhaps.

For myself the question doesn't arise. I may bring my partner here for short holidays, but, once retired, I won't live here anymore.

 

I guess taking her to live in your home country, is one way to find out if she really, really loves you.

Edited November 5, 2013 by Classic Dry

[slim55]

I know I'm being provocative here, and I admit I like to stir you guys up a bit ( you're so stirable uppable )

but I am interested ( not to say fascinated ) by your responses.

 

Now, considering that most of us have one or two, perhaps all of the following -

 

1. Old

2. Very high forehead ( bald ! )

3. Overweight ( can only check out your equipment in a mirror )

4. Plastic teeth

5. Poor eyesight

6. Hearing deficit

7. Tired

8. Alcohol dependant

9. Smoker

10. Varicose veins

 

I can lay claim to over half of those things. I don't expect to grace a pin up calendar anytime soon.

 

Now, I know that physical attributes aren't everything, but come on !!

 

When she first saw you, this healthy, young, cute, energetic, lively filipina

Did she think " WOW, what a gorgeous man"

or did she think "Matandang Mayaman Madaling Mamatay" ?

 

Come on now, be honest. Lets get real !

 

If you were such a filipina would you fall in love with you ?

Since you asked and if you have to ask, in a word "no", sorry.

[BrettGC]

I linked this thread to the Short Angry One, she just about wet herself laughing.  She then said "You're smarter than that aren't you?"

"...."

[robert k]

I never intended anything other than living in the RP and she refused to come to the US even if we could get her a visa. There was in fact some worry that I would not return to the RP, with earthquakes, super typhoons and a small accident.  I will be back though because she tells me she would have me even if we lived in a nippa hut  :) 

Edited November 15, 2013 by robert k

[Thomas]

I never intended anything other than living in the RP and she refused to come to the US even if we could get her a visa. There was in fact some worry that I would not return to the RP, with earthquakes, super typhoons and a small accident.  I will be back though because she tells me she would have me even if we lived in a nippa hut  :) 

Are you married yet?

I hope she - and mine - will say such AFTER marriage ceremony too  :)

[Papa Carl]

I have said before, most Filipina that I have met, who after leaving the Philippines seem to change, they loose all the best qualities of being a Filipina.

 

I for one would never consider taking my wife to live any where other than here in the Philippines.

 

But....., maybe that has more to do with my own insecurity, than to do with my wife?

 

 

Papa Carl

[anthonytt]

I have said before, most Filipina that I have met, who after leaving the Philippines seem to change, they loose all the best qualities of being a Filipina.

Papa Carl

So true as I know from my experience., part of the reason we are moving back to the Philippines.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[BrettGC]

So true as I know from my experience., part of the reason we are moving back to the Philippines.

 

Well thankfully after visiting here twice, SAO has no ambition to live here.  Her comment was "Honey, I love your family, and your kids, but why would I want to live in a country where the things that don't really matter seem so important in everyone's life?".  I sometimes think we were separated at birth.