Negative Vibes

[Larry45]

Decided I will start a new thread way down here to rant about the daily bullsh&t I experience, and how I attempt to reduce or negate it all......and take my shot at living a happy, positive life here.  Been here 5 years, married with 3 year old daughter....I don't even pretend to know it all, but I know a little bit.    

 

A few hours ago, I took my daughter outside to water the plants and watch the sun come down.  The half moon was high in the sky and amazingly, there was a rainbow in the midst of some stormy clouds.  I don't remember her seeing a rainbow before in real life, and she was amazed.  We are sitting there talking about it, and the neighbors see us, burst into laughter, talk sh&t in Bisaya and do their best to ruin the moment.  To me, that's Filipinos, in a nutshell.  I have to explain to my daughter that they are.....(insert explanation here). 

 

I've experienced this same phenomenon so many times in the past 5 years, it makes me sick.  FIlipinos have something inside them that makes it impossible to be happy for anyone else.  It's a tribal mentality and if there's nothing in it for them, they hate the whole concept of it.  Maybe it's different in the big cities, but here in the province you will NEVER hear, "I'm so happy for my friend...they won the lottery" or "that's so nice Lyn is going to the US...I hope she will be happy there."  It's always negative talk, back-biting, and crab mentality. 

 

Best point I can make on this topic is when my daughter graduated summer school a few months back.  She won best dancing and almost won best grades, despite being a year younger than the rest.  But what makes me proud is that when everyone received their awards, she was the only one that clapped for the others.  The other kids just mocked them and made jokes of the ones who were being awarded.  Sure kids do that, but if you've spent any time in the Phils, you know they learned that from their parents.

 

Anyways, just ranting down here and trying to keep my negativity confined to one thread...lol. :cheersty:  

 

 

[Tukaram (Tim)]

Sometimes you just have to vent a little - understood. 

I have noticed it too and tried to "correct" my wife's behavior.  It was met with confusion - not anger ha ha

 

Good news is I did get her to mostly quit littering!  ...mostly....   :tiphat:

[Methersgate]

The littering I think comes from a culture which until really very recently did not use paper or plastic wrapping. You can discard a banana skin, an eggshell or fish bones without harming the natural environment and people do the same with cigarette packs and plastic bags.

 

In the UK K has become fastidious about littering and always asks "Mahal - is it OK if I smoke here?" before lighting up in the street.

[Jollygoodfellow]

Decided I will start a new thread way down here to rant about the daily bullshit I experience, and how I attempt to reduce or negate it all......and take my shot at living a happy, positive life here.  Been here 5 years, married with 3 year old daughter....I don't even pretend to know it all, but I know a little bit.    

 

A few hours ago, I took my daughter outside to water the plants and watch the sun come down.  The half moon was high in the sky and amazingly, there was a rainbow in the midst of some stormy clouds.  I don't remember her seeing a rainbow before in real life, and she was amazed.  We are sitting there talking about it, and the neighbors see us, burst into laughter, talk shit in Bisaya and do their best to ruin the moment.  To me, that's Filipinos, in a nutshell.  I have to explain to my daughter that they are.....(insert explanation here). 

 

I've experienced this same phenomenon so many times in the past 5 years, it makes me sick.  FIlipinos have something inside them that makes it impossible to be happy for anyone else.  It's a tribal mentality and if there's nothing in it for them, they hate the whole concept of it.  Maybe it's different in the big cities, but here in the province you will NEVER hear, "I'm so happy for my friend...they won the lottery" or "that's so nice Lyn is going to the US...I hope she will be happy there."  It's always negative talk, back-biting, and crab mentality. 

 

Best point I can make on this topic is when my daughter graduated summer school a few months back.  She won best dancing and almost won best grades, despite being a year younger than the rest.  But what makes me proud is that when everyone received their awards, she was the only one that clapped for the others.  The other kids just mocked them and made jokes of the ones who were being awarded.  Sure kids do that, but if you've spent any time in the Phils, you know they learned that from their parents.

 

Anyways, just ranting down here and trying to keep my negativity confined to one thread...lol. :cheersty:  

 

Let me ask you if you ever had a life with nothing? stuff all? hungry? no hope for the future?

 

Well to me a lot of this comes from that no matter what country you live in. The ones that want will belittle those who have what they want no matter where. See it and to some extent do the same when I stand out in the hot sun working while the better offs drive past in their fancy cars.

Although I know you said it's just a rant but from an outsider looking in you hate the Philippines and the way it is so why do you stay? 

[Vince Runza]

Many cultures do something like this. I was actually shocked when somebody suggested that you can't learn something better by reading a book. Of course, that person is probably still sitting in the same pile of manure when that remark was made, decades ago.

 

Got this from Wikipedia: "The tall poppy syndrome is a pejorative term primarily used in the United Kingdom, Australia, New Zealand, and other Anglosphere nations to describe a social phenomenon in which people of genuine merit are resented, attacked, cut down, or criticised because their talents or achievements elevate them above or distinguish them from their peers. This is similar to begrudgery, the resentment or envy of the success of a peer."

[Larry45]

No, JGF, I'm not a blue blood looking down my nose.  I drove trucks for 10 years in the US  to save up for this adventure.....I've posted that before.  It's ok if you don't remember, because I really don't remember your life story either....touche.   And, i don't hate the Philippines, but there's a lot of bullsh&t that happens every single day......and it's nice to know about it.  I will post my daily stuff there until you say otherwise.   That's certainly better than posting it in all the threads, as I have been.  

 

edit....it pisses me off so much....decent person, decent wife, decent life......but everyone wants to sh&t on you.  

Edited November 20, 2015 by Larry45

[davewe]

 

Decided I will start a new thread way down here to rant about the daily bullsh&t I experience, and how I attempt to reduce or negate it all......and take my shot at living a happy, positive life here.  Been here 5 years, married with 3 year old daughter....I don't even pretend to know it all, but I know a little bit.    

 

A few hours ago, I took my daughter outside to water the plants and watch the sun come down.  The half moon was high in the sky and amazingly, there was a rainbow in the midst of some stormy clouds.  I don't remember her seeing a rainbow before in real life, and she was amazed.  We are sitting there talking about it, and the neighbors see us, burst into laughter, talk sh&t in Bisaya and do their best to ruin the moment.  To me, that's Filipinos, in a nutshell.  I have to explain to my daughter that they are.....(insert explanation here). 

 

I've experienced this same phenomenon so many times in the past 5 years, it makes me sick.  FIlipinos have something inside them that makes it impossible to be happy for anyone else.  It's a tribal mentality and if there's nothing in it for them, they hate the whole concept of it.  Maybe it's different in the big cities, but here in the province you will NEVER hear, "I'm so happy for my friend...they won the lottery" or "that's so nice Lyn is going to the US...I hope she will be happy there."  It's always negative talk, back-biting, and crab mentality. 

 

Best point I can make on this topic is when my daughter graduated summer school a few months back.  She won best dancing and almost won best grades, despite being a year younger than the rest.  But what makes me proud is that when everyone received their awards, she was the only one that clapped for the others.  The other kids just mocked them and made jokes of the ones who were being awarded.  Sure kids do that, but if you've spent any time in the Phils, you know they learned that from their parents.

 

Anyways, just ranting down here and trying to keep my negativity confined to one thread...lol. :cheersty:  

 

Let me ask you if you ever had a life with nothing? stuff all? hungry? no hope for the future?

 

Well to me a lot of this comes from that no matter what country you live in. The ones that want will belittle those who have what they want no matter where. See it and to some extent do the same when I stand out in the hot sun working while the better offs drive past in their fancy cars.

Although I know you said it's just a rant but from an outsider looking in you hate the Philippines and the way it is so why do you stay? 

 

The jealousy factor is a good point and exists everywhere. I spent the majority of my life living modestly and making just enough for the bills and a tiny bit more. About 10 years ago I took a job that made my finances much better. I traveled, bought a nicer car (OK, actually I only leased it). I was surprised and a little bit disappointed at the jealousy I suddenly noticed. I naively believed that others should be happy for my late in life improvement in fortunes and of course some are happy for me.

 

I don't yet live in the Philippines but when i am there I haven't noticed it that much. Jealousy might take on a different form there (like trying to become your friend). But there are always people in the world who are envious of happiness - but they exist everywhere.

[Jake]

We are sitting there talking about it, and the neighbors see us, burst into laughter, talk sh&t in Bisaya and do their best to ruin the moment.  To me, that's Filipinos, in a nutshell.  I have to explain to my daughter that they are.....(insert explanation here). 

 

Anyways, just ranting down here and trying to keep my negativity confined to one thread...lol. :cheersty:  

Yup Larry, you said it -- crab mentality.  It is an observation from fishermen that as one crab tries to get out of the basket, the rest will pull him down.  I hope the tsimis among your neighbors don't get out of hand.  They already got you pegged.  It would be counter productive to get even with them.  

 

Perhaps surprise them and kill them with kindness.....he, he.

[BobP]

Hi Larry45,

 

Could the jealousy of the Filipinos be an age related happening?  Are the younger men and women more jealous or do they demonstrate it more than others/older?  Or could it be more gender related?  More men seem to be jealous than women?

 

Could it be educationally related? Would you guess more of the ones who appear to do it are college educated or are most of them most likely uneducated.  I suppose most of the citizens in Phil are high school educated, so this is probably a moot point.

Obviously you don't know a person's education by sight, but if you had to make a guess, which way would you vote?

 

Just throwing in my 2 cents for thought.

 

Being someone who is seriously considering moving to Phil, I appreciate your observations and comments of everyone.

 

Seems like I learn something new and different daily in this forum.

 

Thanks everyone!

 

BobP

:cheersty:

[frosty (chris)]

Well I must be different, most of the filipino's I know have more than I do :hystery:. The guy next door, drives a better car than me, actually they have 4 cars, all late models and houses they own. He throws parties and I always get an invite, lavish affairs they are too, plenty of good food and drink, sometimes when I return home at night the family are all sitting out the front with cold Redhorse, always offered a drink any many times have sat drinking with them, they never ask for any thing in return. My sari friend has three or four sub div houses she owns as well as other property. Maybe Iiving in a sub div is different as most have there own house and I can tell you all drive much better cars than I do.