Regrets

[intrepid]

Regrets?  I'll try to keep it short.  We had planned to move to the Philippines after retirement which we did and for the most part we loved it with our newly built home.  Yes I did get frustrated with traffic and parking, but I dealt with it.  However, after five years our daughter was missing her US family and friends.  She was 10 when we arrived and in High School when we returned to the states.  Both my parents died the year before we returned which was also hard for her.  She is striving in school and taking college classes for her last year.  No for the most part I have readjusted here and really not as bad as I had thought it would be.  My wife lived here in the states after we got married for ten years and again now.  She has many friends here and doesn't mind the seasons at all.  We had planned to return to the Philippines after our daughter finished school or college.  But now my wife thinks she prefers to stay in the states and just winter in the Philippines.  Sounds good to me.  So no real regrets to worry about.

[Mike J]

No regrets for me but I do feel frustration at times.  Those frustrations stem for the same reasons as other have posted.  That being said, I expect there would be frustrations also in my home country.  My extended Filipino family is a bit of a mixed bag, but for the most part I love them and they seem to have accepted me as family.  As others have already mentioned each country has its positives and negatives, and I am reminded a bit of the old saying; "the grass always looks to be greener on the other side."   There are estimates that 50 percent of expats who move here end up going back to their home countries within five years.  The Philippines is not for everyone and definitely not the "paradise live like a king" that some would like to believe.   I plan on living out what remains of my life here in the Philippines.

[JJReyes]

For bored Expats, the suggested solution is to find an advocacy, except of course local politics.  Love playing the guitar?  Purchase a few and offer to teach students at a nearby high school after dismissal.  Enjoy a game of chess?  Teach neighborhood children how to play and giveaway inexpensive sets.  In Ecuador, we encountered a group of retirees who reserved tables at a restaurant next to a junior college.  (There are an estimated 12,000 Norte Americanos living in Cuenca.)  The college administration was informed that their students could come, and for the price of a soda, practice English.  In return, they assisted the foreigners with Spanish pronunciation.  More fun than sitting and bitching about how things are getting bad all over the world.  

My wife is pretty good at this.  The siren of a passing ambulance in the middle of the night is very irritating.  She says, "Ah.  Someone is being saved." and goes back to sleep.  I stay up being more irritated by her comment.

Edited February 24 by JJReyes

[JJReyes]

14 hours ago, Lee said:

If it were not for my wife, I would have never come here to live. She dutifully followed me from different jobs in the US and Europe for over 35 years. When we retired, she suggested she would like to go home---so how could I refuse. She has regrets about this decision now as her family is about as sorry as they come.

IMO the country itself is not much better.

Someone on this forum recommended the two islands rule.  You should live two islands away from the family.

[hk blues]

16 hours ago, craftbeerlover said:

I live the same way, I put them aside (we really have no choice).  We live in a third world country that really wants to stay a third world country.   Having a family here and knowing what they have to look forward to in the future, makes the pill a little more difficult to swallow.   We do our best, laugh, enjoy, see things when we can etc....   But I share Lee's sentiments. 

I hear you but from most of what I am reading and hearing from many developed countries,  including specifically our respective own, it ain't what it used to be. Hence my last sentence on my post above - You gotta live somewhere.  

The grass is always greener springs to mind.

[hk blues]

3 hours ago, JJReyes said:

Someone on this forum recommended the two islands rule.  You should live two islands away from the family.

That depends.  

If the wife is unsure about moving to the USA because of her family then moving 2 islands away may already be akin to moving to the US.

With technology and communication being what it is nowadays there is no escape!

[stevewool]

5 hours ago, hk blues said:

I hear you but from most of what I am reading and hearing from many developed countries,  including specifically our respective own, it ain't what it used to be. Hence my last sentence on my post above - You gotta live somewhere.  

The grass is always greener springs to mind.

Indeed , 

[BrettGC]

I miss my kids, nephews and niece far more than I thought I would having spent so much of my life away from them, but they're visiting en masse soon enough and I'll meet my youngest grandchild then as well. 

I have the same frustrations and gripes as most of you.  But I have the perspective that I was very unhappy in and with Australia before moving, and had been for some years.  There's just been a a fundamental change in the way people conduct themselves and treat each other in general.  "You disagree with me, we must have an argument and can never be friends" is just one of many examples.  I saw the same thing evolving whilst  living in the US for a couple of years from 2010 whereas when I'd lived there prior to that, it wasn't so "in your face". 

I actually watched the Aussie news a couple of weeks ago for the first time in months and it depressed me.  I knew it would, but wanted to find out about the upcoming tax cuts so there I was.  

I'm not saying the bigger picture is any better here, and in many ways it's worse for reasons a few of you have mentioned, but for me at least, I'm actually happy for the first time in years. 

 

 

[craftbeerlover]

15 minutes ago, BrettGC said:

I'm actually happy for the first time in years. 

at the end of the day, that is what should be most important!    On a personal level, I am happier than I have been for most of my adult life, which is why I 'choose' to stay here.   And once again, for the record, I dont walk around like a grumpy a**h*le.   Maybe venting here helps somewhat!   Cheers all

[craftbeerlover]